Reading Reviews for etc. etc. (and life goes on)
1,024 Reviews Found

Review #26, by Shinicha A Kingdom For My Name

27th July 2015:
Hey! I just read all the so-far existing chapters in one go, and I feel terribly sorry that I didn't stop after each to leave a review. It was simply too addicting!!!

In general I'm amazed with your writing style. It manages to lose itself in details while still flowing nicely, weaves dialogues and internal monologues and action into one seamless, wonderful motion picture.

Of course it's also hilarious, and the absurdity of the events brought me to tears (from laughter) several times: food fights in the great hall??? A rampage in padfifoots??? Even more amazing is the fact that you manage to deliver it with elegant seriousness and angstyness without it ever loosing the humour.

The other thing is your characters; they are really alive and real!! None of them seems shallow, everyone has their mysterious side (even, or especially Appy! She's just crepyy.) I especially love Clemence as the main cast and how we slowly, slowly see her change over the chapters. Not one thing seemed ever 'out of character', i really feel that you are in everybody's head - even the quirkers ones haha.

But since all of the characters are somewhat ambiguous, the mystery of WHO 'the enemy' is becomes almost unbearable!
At first, with the Lipstick on the paper, of course I thought of Appy herself.

And then I can never shake this feeling of "what if it's Dom???" She could've shattered the teapots on V-Day! Also, Rose is still in my mind, although she seemed quite amiable when she wanted thr letter to be published... Endless possibilities! What if it's innocent and nice Janey who just wants the gossip to end and start a serious school paper?

On another note: i also really loved how you created new places in the castle that fit into Hogwarts smoothly. The speak easy, the newsroom,...

And overall the way the romance evolved was just perfect. The moments of passion, in the hallway or at the lake were so well built up and intense, i started drooling and actually got goosebumps! Still, Albus is maybe the character i understand the last. His actions seem a bit random all over the story. But that's maybe just him: making spontaneous decisions, actually not very cool at all, very emotional and caring.

So, sorry for this kinda unspecific and over-viewy any case I'm so glad i read this and super-thankful that you wrote this!! I can't wait for the last chapter and the epilogue :) :)

Author's Response: I'm really happy with what etc's done with my writing style; writing this and Capers at the same time meant they got to feed into each other a lot. etc explored a lot of narrative styles that I'd use in Capers and my description and action in Capers lent itself here.

Also absurd yet serious (seriously absurd, har har) is my writing in a nutshell 8D WRITING FANGIRL MASSACRES WITH A STRAIGHT FACE.

You read it all in one go, so you remember that there IS SOMEONE OUT THERE STILL that we don't know about! 8D Who, indeed? I like your ideas! They're sneaky. I'm sneaky.

I'm glad you like what you've read so far. Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I'll try to get the next chapter up soon.

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Review #27, by randmnickname A Lesson in Persuasion

15th June 2015:
"Don't you dear me, buttercup."
"Don't you buttercup me, sweetheart!"
"Don't you sweetheart me, honey"
"Don't you honey me, dear!"
"Don't you dear me..."

Author's Response: Day 61: "Don't you... sweetie-pie... me... (gasping for breath) love muffin."

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Review #28, by Roisin A Kingdom For My Name

11th June 2015:
IT'S UP?!?! Somehow I missed the clanging of pots and pans. YOU PROMISED TO MAKE NOISE.

Not that it matters--I've already had shouty convos with you about this chapter, but whatever, ~HOUSE CUP 2015 REVIEW GO GRYFFINDOR!~

I really love the changes to this chapter. The theme and idea develops really nicely, and the end is an absolute gut punch. And the writing throughout is just stellar. There's something sort of efficient about the writing which I appreciate. It doesn't get bogged down in strings of purple prose, but the fresh word choices and rather workmanly and sparing phrasing creates a beautiful over all effect. The pace, snark and wit totally propell the chapter.

Also, I notice the Rita's relationship with Clemence is more developed than in the draft (I think?) I'd never twigged before that Clemence was raised by her, granted, I haven't read the last chapters in like a year.

Anyway, this is just fantastic. I need to stop being a bad writing buddy and go shout at you about OF now. (DO EET)

Author's Response: IT IS!! I thought you saw it xD bangalangadingdong noise noise noise

I'm glad all the changes worked out c: You said alll the right things to make it mesh together. I still have your suggestion about prewriting the next chapter haunting me, but I knew I could never do it. I CAN NEVER WRITE ON TIME, ROISIN ;A; NEVER EVER.

I had a bit of Rita before, but her development was a little of an afterthought in this fic; something I'm definitely going to develop (more like, HAVE to develop) for OF. Amongst other things.

♥ ♥ ♥

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Review #29, by Anon A Kingdom For My Name

7th June 2015:
Wow. That... was amazing.

I might've said this in my previous review, so bear with me. But I love your story to pieces. Characters, plot, writing, dialogue, everything.

You have realistic, complicated characters, like Dom and Clemence and Albus, and even side characters like Rose and Appy, that aren't typical one-adjective fanfiction characters (like the ones you ridiculed in Appy's story. Hah.)

You have a creative plot, one that I can definitely see getting published. The pacing is perfect, with the Albus/Clemence romance and with the Quirky girls and the "Teams". I never got bored or felt that it was dragging on.

Your writing was aces. (Especially that last parting line. "A prince in my hand, a kingdom usurped. I have everything I never wanted." Dang.) You also wrung in themes and got deep. Your dialogue was creative and hilarious at times while serious on others.

In short, this story is perfect. I can't even think about any flaws. Your'e completely awesome, you deserve all the reward you got, and I hope you keep writing :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much c: I got a lot more literary and am sort of testing how that's going. I'm very fond of recurring themes/motifs in this story, but I don't expect anyone to see any except me, xD -- I deeply appreciate that someone is actually! Pointing out! Literary! Things! Part of why it's been so hard to write lately is me trying to weave waaay too much into my writing, when I really should just get it done with 8D I told myself I'd try harder when I write the OF. Oh well!

♥! I hope you won't have to wait long for the end!

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Review #30, by heartjily4ever A Kingdom For My Name

28th May 2015:
I cannot believe this is nearly done with - i love this story and your characters so much seriously I'm almost addicted to your writing (so much better than it sounds.) Despite the clear hatred ;) you must have for your characters for putting them through so much stress and angst, I don't want the angst to end if it means this story won't.

I'm so happy she actually said love - pretty sure thats an admission which is great for them and while I would usually describe them as now a cute couple ( disgustingly my new go to word seems to be cute, which I kinda hate) I really don't think cute will ever be the word to describe all of them, their complicated thing they have which is amazing to read about, must be a nightmare to write about and I love - but it's not cute. It's just something (don't know what) but its brilliant.

I kind of completely forgot about her relationship with Rita Skeeter - pretty sure it's been mentioned before and was a big plot thing at one point but it was ages ago that I read the first chapters so noway i'll still have that in my noggin. Seems like a rubbish aunt - not that I ever had high expectations of her as a family member, what with her track record.

Ill Behooved is the best start of a headline relating the centaurs ever seriously how do you think of this stuff.

It seems like Hogwarts is on some sort of detox from all the craziness of the teams, or on a come down which doesn't seem like it's going to bode well. Just have to hope that things don't get worse for Albus and Clemence.

I'll probably start drooling like a Quaker if I compliment you're writing anymore but oh well - it's genius amazing, hilarious and deep at the same time which is just double amazing. So excited to read more

Author's Response: Ahhh thank you so much c: Bahaha, I never knew until I started writing why anyone would put their characters through such toil. Now every other sentence--oops, they're miserable. Oops, they tripped. Oops, their dream's dead.

It's been interesting to see how people have interpreted this chapter! I like to read Clemence's voice rather sarcastically, but I also had a debate with the bf over Paramore's 'Ain't if Fun' which he doesn't think is sarcastic. Maybe I'm just a skeptic.

Rita's mentioned briefly every so often. I wish I brought up more of Clemence's family, and partly, how little family she has. But I get to expand on it next chapter!

I'M GLAD SOMEONE POINTED OUT ILL BEHOOVED. It's one my favorite headlines from all my stories. Stables on sacred centaur grounds, I didn't think I could get more offensive.

♥ thank you so much! sorry for the long wait for the next chapter, but I'm writing!

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Review #31, by noturavggurl A Kingdom For My Name

19th May 2015:
So pleased to see an update! I love this story, especially the quality of writing, and the proper spelling (the characters aren't too bad either ;) ) Thank you for creating this clever, snarky, wonderful story. I heart Clemence & Albus!

Author's Response: Thank you! c:

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Review #32, by thegreatcatsby V-Day D-Day

18th May 2015:
You mean to tell me that you cannot leave more than one review on a chapter?
/camera pans dramatically to face
/looks sharply to the side, eyeliner on point
/insert awesome title sequence

squeeE new banner Lily Collins is normally too smiley(?)/sweet looking in my opinion to be Clemence but that look in her eyes in the banner and that EYEBROW is perfection.

Really channeling my inner Appy/fangirl here with my etc. and banner love but Appy is the queen. It just seems to me that Clemence is a flawed/somewhat unreliable narrator (love her too though), and dehumanized Appy and her Quirkers, when Appy's actually pretty awesome. She EMBRACES her inner fan/girliness and becomes incredibly successful and powerful based on it and has a quirky club and just /sob/ my fangirl feels. A lot of people underestimates fan, fangirls especially, and make us out to be some insane, crazy, desperate, sad nutbug /teenagers/ but they gloss over the nuance of it all and don't realize that, heck yeah, fans are POWERFUL. We make billions at the box office, create stars, find a strong community in each other, and drive some pretty incredible movements (s/o to the Harry Potter Alliance and 1D fandom [#NoControlDay]). We are fanpeople, hear us roar. (Much love to Clemence too- she and Appy are like the two wildly different facets of my personality- the fangirl and the bitter cynical journalist. And much love to Dom as well with her general queenly flawlessness, and Pickett, and Al, and Scorp, and /the complexity and reversed gender roles of this fanfic slays me in general- you just nail it all around./

tl;dr I just popped by to compliment the banner and ended up on a fangirl/character rant. Sorry. :D

Author's Response: HELLO AGAIN.

Angry Lily Collins is just about perf. Ellen Page never fit Clemence exactly, but no one else had a good smirk! I actually prefer angry Lily Collin's model~ smirk. Less sarcastic looking, more like she's judging you. Why can't faceclaims just look evil all the time?

ISN'T APPY ALL OF US? Ok, a little less homicidal, but still. Fangirls are wonderful and terrible and everything that comes with large groups of people. Full of potential but also full of sheep, and they can be as inspiring as they can be stupid. I think their best quality is their earnestness. Their willingness to fight for what they believe in and their lack of shame for it. When they align in the right ways, they can make something great. The wrong ways, welp, there's quite literally war.

I think Clemence is mostly angry about the mob's lack of culpability and that popular opinion is taken as truth. And, obviously, that people aren't listening to /her/. ;)


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Review #33, by Addison Pickett A Kingdom For My Name

8th May 2015:
Holy wowza. I missed you! I've been checking endlessly for updates, and now wow! You know, I kinda did want it to end happily like last chapter, but it just wouldn't feel right. I like this dark and twisted fairy tale you've set up. Actually, I don't... I LOVE IT.

Also, I may not have gotten my shirtless Pickett, but I got Al and Clem together in the bathroom and that is a completely reasonable exchange for my lovely Pickett. (I'm honestly joking about Pickett being shirtless, you don't need nor have to put it it. I just really love my Pickett.) That scene though... Mm... It was just the perfect transition from last chapter's ending to this chapter. Also it was hot. Very hot. Es muy caliente. #SpanishCompliments

I'm sorry. I just finished Spanish homework before I read this.

My favorite line has to be "Queen Dom's retired from queendom, and she's bored." I like the wordplay. Wordplay is one of my favorite things. That and Pickett... who is not mentioned that much in this chapter... I kid. This chapter is perfect just the way it is and you do not need to add anymore Pickett to it. You are an incredibly gifted writer and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

Anyway, dearie... take your time in uploading. I'm just glad you did! It was worth the wait, however. I just love this series so much. Keep it up.

Love always,
Addie Pickett

Author's Response: HULLO AGAIN! Ahh I'm so glad you LOVE the darkness. That's what they're all about. Love can consume as easily as love can save, and I don't think either of them would deny that their relationship is unhealthy as much as they're rolling with it. They love the sex, they love the war, but how much - when you get down to the daily grind and domestics - do they really love each other?

If wordplay weren't my favorite thing, the world would be saved from some very bad puns.

I'm actually personally incredibly sad I didn't get to put Pickett into this chapter. Only because he shows up A LOT next chapter :D :D SO STAY TUNED? I'll try to put him in something nice for you, wink wink (pajamas may be the best I can do, if we're talking real talk).

♥ thank you so much! c:

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Review #34, by randomnickname A Kingdom For My Name

5th May 2015:
Just reread to catch the nuances I missed in my avidity last time.

This time a sentence struck me in particular: "Here is my heart cracked open: an embrace of stone, windowless and grey, deaf to the world. Any truth can be rewritten in"
That's what I mean when I say you're an AWESOME author. Deep, bitter, great.
Ah, and what I forgot to say last time: Woe betide if we don't get any more of Henry - finish what you started, I don't want to die not knowing!

My kind regards, and eternal gratitude

Author's Response: Eee, one of my fav fav lines. I rewrote that one a few times before I settled on it. I'm glad you like it too ♥

LOTS of Henry next chap. Lots of Henry and Appy :D

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Review #35, by cathilde A Kingdom For My Name

4th May 2015:
This is one of the very few fics I always remember where I'm at in. Clemence is genuinely one of my favourite characters ever, amongst all books I have read and series I have seen. I love the way you don't try to rush the plot, and there is a sense of morality and pensiveness in each chapter. I love the way you've represented Albus. I loved loved loved when tey read Appy's script. I think it's great that your characters are witty, entertaining and original but still manage to be relatable. Thank you so much for writing this fix and continuing to write t through the years basically.

Author's Response: ah thank you *U* comments like these make my agony all worth it. I try really hard to make this mean something for the people who read it, even though sometimes I think "it's just a fic." I'm forever grateful for how people have responded to it, and how that's encouraged me to explore much more than I planned with etc's initial scope. Thank you so much again! ^__^

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Review #36, by uxutwist A Kingdom For My Name

2nd May 2015:
Won't lie, I was INCREDIBLY shocked when I say this updated! Had to remember what this story was about but hey, thanks for the update! Can't believe it's finishing though.

Author's Response: Thank you! It's been forever but I'm glad you came back to read *u*

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Review #37, by patronus_charm A Kingdom For My Name

2nd May 2015:
Whoo new chapter ! :D

Ooh the first scene with Albus was interesting shall we say ;) It does make me wonder how their relationship will ever really function as Clemence is such a complicated character with the way sheís never truly sure of what she wants. It almost seems as if sheís quite insecure about the whole idea of being an in a relationship whereas Albus is much more up for it, so it will be interesting to see what the endgame is with these two.

One thing I noticed in the chapter was the increased use of italics and I thought it worked really well, like it added another layer to the chapter almost? I donít know, but I liked it!

Hahaha, Iíve forgotten how much I loved seeing all the girls in Hogwarts fight over which side they were on and who supported who. Itís just so funny to watch as they get so hysterical about everything, and you write all their emotions and reactions really well so itís just so funny to read! Hmm, Sandra is an interesting one to watch as I think sheís got no limits when it comes to this kind of stuff so it will be interesting to see what she gets up to in later chapters!

Whoo a sort of cameo from Rita! That letter was just so her and it was so funny to see the way she sees an opportunity in everything! I really wish we could meet her in the story as thatís bound to be hilarious, especially if she tries to gain publicity from the whole Clemence/Albus thing!

Ooh, wow, I didnít realise we were so close to the end but Iím excited to see how this winds up as this has been a really funny and excellent read, and donít worry about the gap in the updates life has that annoying tendency to take priority over fanfiction. :P ♥


Author's Response: KIANA! ♥

I was wondering about what kind of reaction I'd receive coming back with a scene like that ;) Wouldn't have been as in your face if I didn't have a year long hiatus before that, but that's on me. I'm like that ghost baroness, tittering behind a fan.

I think you're definitely right that Albus is much more up for the relationship than Clemence. And why not? He actively pursued her, while Clemence never really wanted this relationship; she more or less stumbles into it and doesn't care enough to try nor leave.


And the girls c: the fangirls are everything to me. Fangirl at heart forever.

♥ thank you so much for coming back and reading! ^__^ I'll try to make this next update soon.

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Review #38, by randomnickname A Kingdom For My Name

1st May 2015:
My heart made a big leap in my chest as I did my weekly check. AWsm
i'd finally want to learn what's her relationship to her aunt, so I'm very looking forward to this. Sex scene HOT, thanks
And so interesting issues and characters! Hope you go pro one day, cause that's far better than a lot of novels I've read.
And: desperate to hear there's only so few left to go :( you know, those stories you never want to end? this one is one of those. Thanks again, go on!

Author's Response: c: Thank you! I'll get to expand on Clemence and Albus' respective families FINALLY next chapter. Just a little bit, but I think it'll whet the curiosity.

♥ you can always prod me for deets and ficlets on the blog, even after it ends!

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Review #39, by LittleMissPrincess V-Day D-Day

25th April 2015:
"I just need him to understand. You know what it's likeóAl does it, too." She shakes her head. "They think they have it hard, the boys. Believing there must be better people hiding under our skins, and by God, it's up to them to uncover us. They put us on pedestals and they get angry when we don't sit still."

that was amazing

Author's Response: Ahhh, one of my favorite lines :D

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Review #40, by Irene A Kingdom For My Name

24th April 2015:
I was going to say you should totally do this as an original story--so I'm SO glad you're deciding to do that! It's amazing, honestly. Really happy for you:)

Pertaining to the story: I just love Al Potter. 'Nuff said. :)

Can't wait for the next update! You're a great writer! xx

Author's Response: Very excited about it! Thank you c:

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Review #41, by my_voice_rising A Kingdom For My Name

23rd April 2015:
Hiya! I wanted to leave an actual review instead of just a tumblr ask... I read this chapter on my break at work and it was all I had time for huehuehue.

This is seriously your best writing! You can really tell that you put a lot of thought into making every single word count, and move the plot along. A couple phrases that stuck with me are Here, with only each other to want, we kiss and kiss until it could fill a language. Here, we make sense, and I want fame; I'm fame's girlfriend. The way that Clemence has fallen for him is so wonderful too. You've done what everyone tries to do in fic--the accidental falling in love with your enemy--and done it so wonderfully!

I have to say that part of me thought/wanted (still wants?) the last scene to actually be Pickett and not Albus! Though I blame that on the Clickett tumblr graphics ;)

Seriously Gina, you should be so proud. This is really amazing writing. Can't wait for the next!

Author's Response: Eeee thank you! I agonized over SO. MANY. WORDS. this time, like I totally forgot how to write. One punctuation at a time *pats typing muscles*

"fallen for him" ;) DEPENDS.

And I will say cryptically for the readers reading reviews: BUT WHERE ARE ALL THOSE CLICKETT SCENES I SUPPOSEDLY WROTE? THE CLAPPY SCENES? Oh, this is just the lull before mobs. Pitchforks and ships will rain from the heavens. No umbrella will help you next chapter.


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Review #42, by JasmineTheNotMentionedPolishWeasley A Kingdom For My Name

23rd April 2015:
Found this story only yesterday, and I really couldn't tear my eyes from the screen. Just brilliant! All of the characters, ideas, plot twists, Rita Skitter, the Witchy Business! I mean, it's just perfect, maybe a little bit too cynical at times, but I don't mind, being a devoted cynic and all (ok, so maybe I'm not a cynic like Clemence, but a girl can hope, right?) By the way, I'm in love with the story, can I marry it? Or better, can I marry Henry? I guess he wouldn't mind, as me and Dominique seem to be very much alike.
I hope that you'll find the time to work on and publish the next chapter asap, meanwhile, give poor Barny the Owl my wishes of best luck.
PS. I'm sorry for any mistakes I've made. English is not my first language, but I'm trying!
PS.2 +12 language for Mature Story reviews is just absurd.
PS.3 Listening to the Dead Language Band would be the most awesome thing ever, even if I'm not a pro in latin.

Author's Response: I wouldn't hope to be a cynic like Clemence (especially since hope is such a rare thing for a cynic), but I am who I am, and if that is terribly acerbic at times, well then. And everyone wants a piece of Henry now 8D he's wondering where this was during his six other years at Hogwarts. He's probably scarred after confronting Dom and causing a ruckus with Team Hen-NOs. No marriage for him for awhile, I think.

Thank you so much for reading! You have excellent English, by the way c:

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Review #43, by Kayla A Kingdom For My Name

22nd April 2015:
I was SO HAPPY when I saw this update!! I would have danced with joy except I'm in math class... Your writing style is amazing and satirical and this story is basically everything I aspire to be as a writer. Thank you for the update 💗💗

Author's Response: Eee I'm glad! Thank you for reading! c:

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Review #44, by thegreatcatsby A Kingdom For My Name

22nd April 2015:
/throws cape back with a flourish
/gets it stuck on a tree branch
/spends next 5 minutes untangling

This chapter! Though I may be reading way too much into it, I don't see good things for Clembus as they are right now, at least. They both have WAY too many issues (REALISTIC. I APPROVE.) and though there was romance(-ish), you were putting up so many red flags that I am glad that bulls do not read HPFF. Otherwise, they would have smashed the screen of my clunky laptop which was purchased with the last of my savings, a single poetic tear, and my soul.

"under his moonstruck gaze, I might pass for an angel." RED WORSHIPPY FLAG ALERT
"Here [alone, basically], we make sense." RED FLAG
"if the image of his goddess hasn't quite faded." RED VELVET CUPCAKES
"My name floods his breath; he drowns in it. I've seen enough to know how he fixates. I am just one in a long line of addictions, from firewhiskey to fixing the unfixable." RED FIRE HYDRANTS
"This is love. This is it. This is... it." RED TOMATOES
"He loves me like he's afraid to lose me, and he's more afraid of losing me than he hates me." LOBSTERS

tl;dr I had too many red velvet cupcakes today and am amped up with the stress of starting a story /blows into paper bag

and Hogwarts on Hormones [12+], that is all


I'm just going to imagine you in the background of every scene, waving a snapping lobster in the background every time a red flag is waved. Just a party of waving snapping lobsters as Clemence angsts. Clickclickclickclickclick.

I did, for awhile, think I was going crazy because I swore this chapter was supposed to be miserable. I'll leave it up to reader interpretation but cough, that's a lot of lobsters. I will say that there is certainly a lot of language that seems to say their romance works in a vacuum and that Clemence really isn't happy. There is like, zero happiness in this chapter so ??? I'll withdraw the pitchforks and hand them back out next chapter I guess :'D Following Clemence's footsteps and falling to the QGA mob.

♥ for your well-read red

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Review #45, by IN POST DELIRIUM A Kingdom For My Name

22nd April 2015:
asdlkjfjlkdakljfdjkadjlkfd ah I CHECKED ETC SO OFTEN THIS WHOLE YEAR YOU HAVE NO IDEA I ALMOST DIED WHEN IT SAID THAT YOU actually UPDATED!! :D :D :D *cries* [on a scale of 1-Appy how melodramatic am I]

Author's Response: YOU ARE MAYBE SEVEN-TENTHS APPY. Let us not underestimate how Appy Appy can be. You do not want to go full Appy.

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Review #46, by GubraithianFire A Kingdom For My Name

22nd April 2015:
I thought I'd do what I did for Capers and only review the last chapter with final thoughts and congratulations and all (and end up accidentally reviewing the second to last chapter because I thought it was the last chapter...), but that might not happen for TWO YEARS so I'll list out my feels now. Because I have feels. And they are not the ones I think a lot of readers hoped they would be at this point, so close to the end, but they are worth mentioning anyhow, so I can look back on this and shake my head at my past self. You know nothing, Gubby. The one thing I DO know is that I am horrible at formal reviewing now, so I might as well get back into the swing of that too, before I do have to somehow gather myself and write a final farewell review.

We've learned something about savagery since - holy bathtub scene, Batman, they certainly have. For all its absolutely horrendous connotations, savagery is so the perfect word for these two and their love. You know I have my ship in this story, but you never fail to make me question that shippy conviction even for a few moments, because God, are Albus and Clemence perfect for each other. Theirs is a kind of terrible, awesome (even awful?) love and I kind of adore it. Especially because Clemence knows exactly how awful it is. This is... it. This is what we've been building towards for 21 chapters... and we get an ellipsis. It's almost cruel. No, it is cruel. Which is what makes it amazing.

Clemence's retelling of her own story in that italicized fairytale portion versus what she thinks is the reality is also super telling. She resists the easy, trope-y reading of every possible story, even her own, and her eagerness to downplay her ~heroism~ is so typical, it hurts. God forbid Clemence Fitzgerald be the romantic hero leaping over baddies to save the fainting love interest. But this is who she's supposed to be now. And the unease she has with that role and everything she's being told she is - a gruff but heart-of-gold heroine, the ice queen melting because of luuurve - is so brilliantly underlined by her conversation with Dom and Janey. But we aren't the problem, she tells them: that's so purely Clemence that it comes across as kind of venomous. What on earth could Clemence Fitzgerald, of all people, stand to learn from the rabble that blindly idolizes her and the story she's fallen into by accident (or so she's desperate to believe)? Her answer, we learn, is nothing. Even in this period of supreme discomfort and disillusionment and, now that I think about it, sheer disgust with the role of Potter's girlfriend, she doesn't know that she needs to learn and grow.

Instead she's so desperate to not learn and not change that she'll back herself into a bomb shelter-esque space in the heart of a giant magical stone castle, and block out everyone and everything that unsettles her, even slightly. That line, I care enough to pretend that I care, that's such a rare feeling to see articulated, and it really resonated with me for reasons, but it's so great because it explains Clemence's attitude towards almost everything. And increasingly, it seems, her attitude towards Albus. Love (particularly their love) is so far from being her fairytale end-all/be-all that it could be scary for what it means for Clembus.

Albus isn't faring much better than her in this love-as-goddess-worship/love-as-obliteration-of-self point of view, but he's trying. Or is he? Idk, I vacillate on what I think of him depending on how hot he is in a particular scene, but he isn't super into growth either, is he? And why would he be, if he has now everything he wanted?

Anyway: it's kind of remarkable how Clemence has blocked herself into a corner actually by obtaining more nominal power/scope than she had before and thereby potentially widening the horizons of her own possibility. She's stuck in a dungeon because she won a kingdom, and just as importantly, because she won the king. You know how I love those kinds of arcs for the cruel, quick-witted characters I like to write and read about, and it's being executed so well here it gives me chills to think about.

I cannot wait for the descent. It's going to be messy and possibly heartrending, but it's only a matter of time.

(Not a year, though. Please not a year).

Author's Response: I've let this review sit here since April to remind me what this chapter was all about. You could always explain what I wanted to say better than I could, which I know seems silly because I said the thing via story, but etc is such a discovery process that I honestly don't know what I mean to say sometimes until someone else tells me.

Your formal reviews are such a treat btw *u*

Albus's entire character screams 'I Knew You Were Trouble', but it's such an addicting thing to be loved. Out of context, they're perfect in matching each other, and that's the tragedy/reality of it. A version of them could exist together happily - a version where Clemence is much more like how she started in the story than how she is now. But in that version, she never changes, and there would lie another tragedy entirely. Clemence paradoxically puts so much weight in emotion, and boiled down, I think that's what everyone cheers for--Clemence experiencing something great enough to believe in it. For all she's done, she still only believes in herself. Which segues into the trust issues next chapter.

"God forbid Clemence Fitzgerald be the romantic hero" - basically your entire paragraph is perfect. As I was writing, I only knew it as Clemence resisting her label. These are the two sides of Clemence - the one inexplicably linked to Hogwarts lives and beyond, and the one that believes she can remove herself from all that and rise above. Perhaps that's what draws her into these 'out of context' situations with Albus, because they both desperately want to be where they never need to be a hero nor take responsibility. But the two sides are leaking into each other, and I think it's most telling in how she feels she deserves better than Albus. Former ruthless, casual-snarky Clemence doesn't deserve better, and if she truly believed she were still that person, she would have no issue being with Albus.

I didn't expect that line - 'I care enough to pretend that I care' - to resonate so much. Writing Clemence, I dredge up that part of me that never entirely feels resolved. I remembered what it was like to "learn to care"; the rule is, your feelings need to be genuine, but at the same time, you're supposed to have certain feelings to be a decent human being, and too often, these both couldn't be true at the same time for me. I could either be myself or I could be a decent human being, and everyone else could only see choice #2 because it ought to be easy - natural - to do that. No, it had to be very much learned and - until it became natural - faked. The bomb-shelter heart is much more than protection for Clemence; it's become her identity.

'[Albus] isn't super into growth either, is he? And why would he be, if he has now everything he wanted?' - Albus's lack of growth isn't an accident pretty much because of this. He still suffers no real consequences. Is losing Clemence a great enough catalyst to cause him to change, though? The two previous times that she nearly slipped away - after she's attacked by the girls in the loo and after she's attacked by Appy - were opportunities for him to do *something* but he doesn't. And he still got what he wanted, so why would he?

Thank god you love these arcs because she wouldn't have any other kind :'D but that's me - wary of authority and power. I wouldn't trust a story where power is a real prize.

♥ this review is perf and you are perf. I ultimately may be writing etc for three people, but it means everything to know I'm not alone. That is enough of reason to keep writing.


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Review #47, by teamclem A Kingdom For My Name

21st April 2015:
YES BRILLIANT LOVE IT YOUR WRITING NEVER DISAPPOINTS! clementine's emotions are scattered and enigmatic - surprise! clembus is absolutely my favorite ship and i dearly hope theyre still together two chapters from now. speaking of, i cant believe the journey will be over in just TWO chapters! where else will i eagerly check back for updates when this is over? anyway, im gushing/rambling now so again thanks for the update! my day = made

Author's Response: CLEMENTINE? oh she is sideeyeing you severely right now.

...and you can certainly hope! ;D you all are making MY day!

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Review #48, by teamclem A Kingdom For My Name

21st April 2015:
OH MY GOD YES YES YES I HAVE BEEN CHECKING BACK ALMOST EVERY DAY AND I AM SO EXCITED FOR THIS CHAPTER!!! (got so happty that i typed this up before reading. will report back after i actually read the masterpiece)

Author's Response: \o/ THE TIME HAS COME.

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Review #49, by greenbirds A Kingdom For My Name

21st April 2015:
i'm buuuzzing. the messiah of hpff has come down. it's a new dawn. i am seriously so excited i had to re-read this three times over because i could not stop skimming with excitement. oh my!! clem!! albus!! rita!! happy endings!! sarcastic self-loathing humour!! where do i begin?
you are amazing. i am always looking at your work for inspiration and help both in and outside hpff. i littterally recommend etc, etc to all my friends, even those who stopped being into harry potter aged, like, 9.
so cool. so great. sorry this review is all gushing. i am BEAMING. you ROCK ♥ ♥

Author's Response: YOU FLATTER ME. Crossing my fingers that I don't end up like the last messiah.

Thank you so much for reading!! It means the world that this fic can inspire; more anti-heroines for the world, yes please!

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Review #50, by Queen of Nerds A Kingdom For My Name

21st April 2015:
I adore your writing and this story would be fabulous as and original. I've never laughed so hard!

Author's Response: Thank you so much! c:

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