Nooo!!! Can lorcan and Dom get together pleeeasssee? I hate holden. I know you've written the ones ahead but no I've rated it 8 cos I hate holden Report Review
i love you and i love this story.
just plain beautiful.
btw, i hated you for having Dom and Holden together for so long; made me angrry :3
but it's all better now ^^ Report Review
“Then unless you want yourself to be kicked off the team and magically transformed into Delaney Finnegan’s little sister, I would appreciate you shutting the fuck up.”
BEST. QUOTE. EVER. Report Review
OMG i just love your fanfic it's truly one of the best i have read, not only cos its complicated a little bit (most fanfics are just straight forward)but because its from Dom's pov, i've never read a fanfic about Dom before, mostly it's some OC's pov, one that likes jamesII and has Dom for a best friend, so it has a bit of Dom's relationships in it. i think you should write a lily, roxanne,molly or lucy pov fanfic. it would really suit you and the way you make characters personalities is very enjoyable.
way to go, i can't wait for the second part of this fanfic it's gonna be awsm. =D Report Review
You thought I was dead didn't you? Hahahah
Nope. Still alive and kicking you know what!
My life has been EXPLODING, so I haven't been on. And I can't pick up with real ladies so I'm just going to re read EVERYTHING! A d review what I haven't.
I missed you Paige!!!
And your stories :D
CLEA SMITH :) Report Review
i am so angry.
holden is a prat. he will always be a prat.
end of story. Report Review
*Lighting torch. Grabbing pitchfork.* How could you put them together? Report Review
LORCAN!! He is sweet and quiet, and there is still the fact that Holden might be using Dom, because of the letter Fleur sent him.. and now I'm rambling.(: Report Review
Okay. Yeah. Now. I want to go now.- Fred- that was so funny!! Btw, love the story!(: Report Review
Hi, so I've just finished reading your entire your entire story in three days and I think you should know it's amazing. Dominique is such a unique character and her epiphany at the end was beautifully written, especially the key and lock analogy. Yes I was extremely bothered when Holden first came into the picture, but then I grew to like him a little... And then I would remember the letter and wish lorcan would just grow a pair and get over it(hehe). Anyway, Penelope is an amazing characte as well and her James are downright adorable. I'm sure you have someone in store for Freddie in the sequel so I don't worry too much about the happy boy:) one of my favorite things was definitely James and doms relationship. It was the perfect balance of loving, playful, and somber. So basically I loved your story although I must say that I did notice the resemblance to Because I Said So a couple chapters before you mentioned it in your note:p I can't wait to read the sequel which I'm sure will include all of the Dom/lorcan action we missed here. Can't wait to read the sequel! 10/10
P.s. Honor jones must go down. Report Review
I know you've had your story finished for quite a while now, but I've been rooting for Lorcan the entire time! Your story is amazing! Can't wait for the sequel!!! :) Report Review
GREAT story! I couldnt stop reading it! You did a wonderful job. One of my favorites! :)Author's Response: Thank you so much :) Report Review
it was really good!! After harry potter ended i couldnt stand that i didnt know what happened to their kids and this totally helped seriously keep writing your great only criticism though is to not use the word fuck quite as much but other than that AMAZING i couldnt stop readingAuthor's Response: Thank you so much :) Report Review
you have now kick-started my obsession with next generation fanfiction (im not sure whether or not to thank you as it will surely take over my life)
however i will thank you for writing this incredible story.
bloody genius if you ask me. waiting till the morning to begin the sequel, maybe.
-LfgAuthor's Response: Awh, I'm glad you're now addicted to next gen! It's my favorite :)
Thank you! :) Report Review
I've waited to review until I'd finished reading the whole story, because I have been too hooked to drag my eyes away from the story to type a few words into a box. Sory bout that.
Anyway, this is possibly the best hpff I've ever read. It's certainly up there in the top.
I'm not quite sure how I feel about Lorcan/Dom. I mean, at first I was convinced that he was the one. Then Dom fell for Holden and I liked him. But now I'm back to liking Lorc. But that could change.
I just wanted to say thank you so much for writing this :)Author's Response: That means SO much to me, thank you :) Report Review
WOW! So I just finished reading your story and I have to say you've done an incredible job. There is no way I believe that this is your first story you've ever written, its too good. I have a lot of feedback for you on the whole thing, and i hope you don't mind if I leave a long review.
1. To begin with, your grammar and English skills are top notch. Not only do you have very few misspellings and grammatical errors, but your prose is excellent. At no time did I find myself confused by your writing nor did I have to reread sentences to understand exactly what you were trying to write. Well done!
2. I personally felt that the quidditch game really slowed down your story, almost to the point of a standstill. I think there were two and a half chapters between Dom's breakfast and the actual game. You have done a great job in establishing Dom as a character in previous chapters so I felt a lot of her narration was unnecessary. I already guessed most of the things that were going through her head. I thought a few of the paragraphs could have been shortened and the scenes would still flow just fine, but thats just my opinion.
3. Although I was rooting for Lorcan the entire story, I felt like he was a secondary (or even tertiary) character. There are very few scenes with him in it, and a lot of those scenes Dom tells us that he's not acting like his usual self. I know that through Dom, you tell us the kind of person that Lorcan is, but if your readers don't witness it themselves then its hard for them to identify. I'm not surprised that a lot of your reviewers sided with Holden in this story, we see him almost three times as much!
4. The character of Dominique is absolutely brilliant! I'm not sure if your aware of how very complex you've made her and the fact that you were able to stay true to her through the entire story. What I mean is at no point did I ever find her doing something or saying something that didn't jive with her personality. Many authors (and I'd probably have to include myself in this) tend to create interesting characters, but have them do something completely against their nature during some point in the story. Nice job not letting that happen!
5. I never quite realized how much Dom had changed to be with Holden until the last few chapters. You showed us all along, and I never quite picked up on it. All of a sudden I noticed that instead of breaking all the Lady Rules at the beginning of every chapter Dom was following them. I was like 'holy crap!" That was a really cool, subtle way of showing the changes that Dom was going through as a result of being with Holden.
6. Overall I think it was a very creative story that had me hooked from the very first chapter. Although I don't nessecarily agree with your portrayal of all the Weaslys (I think Fleur isn't that bad) I commend you on putting everything into context and writing a fluid storyline. Everything was 100% believable. Again, not something that is easy by any means.
You should feel extremely proud of yourself for being able to write such a great story with a high caliber of skill. Forget making this a favorite story, you're now a favorite author. Can't wait to read more of your stuff!Author's Response: Wow this is a FABULOUS review! Thank you SO much. This means a lot to me. I'm glad you went through and noticed so much of this, and I appreciate you taking the time to tell me all of it as well :) Report Review
Your story is great so far but i really dont want Dom and Wood together :( but im enjoying reading your story i get excited to see what happens next :)Author's Response: I know it, but keep reading! :) Report Review
I like your story, but I think that you go off into little tangents a lot and there's lots of time between the dialogue, which makes the story move slowly. It's okay to know all this stuff, but we don't need everything in the story all at once.Author's Response: That's just the style of writing that I use - some chapters move slow, some chapters move quickly. It all depends on what's happening inside Dominique's mind.
But thanks! Report Review
This probabley sounds crazy but this chapter actually made me cry :PAuthor's Response: Awh, I cried when I wrote it! Thanks so much. Report Review
So, I know you wrote this a while ago, but I hope you'll still read this review at some point... I basically just read your story in one go (sorry I didn't review each chapter- I couldn't stop) and I am genuinely in love with it. I had a massive stint from midnight til 4 in the morning, so I'm seriously exhausted, but it was unbelievably worth it! Your writing is excellent. I absolutely love your characters, especially Dom- she seems really real and 3 dimensional. Also, loved the ending. Lorcan's so perfect, though I've got to say, you kept me guessing the whole way through as to who she'd end up with! Really, really well done!! I'm off to read Real Ladies now, majorly looking forward to it :) Thank you so much for sticking with this story and adding to HPFF the gem that is Ladylike :)Author's Response: Don't worry, I read and reply to all of my reviews. :) I really appreciate you leaving one, by the way!
I'm glad you love the characters and the story, especially so much that you read it for four hours straight - it's such an honor! I know how good stories have to be to deserve that.
Thank you very much. :) Report Review
I've been sat up all bloody night reading this, and it was amazing. You're a very talented writer.
I loved the ending, it was perfect. And I absoloutely cried my eyes out. I know, what a soft idiot.
Well done, and thankyou :}Author's Response: I cried writing it, so don't worry. Thank you so much :) Report Review
THIS IS A BRILLIANT STORY!
Honestly one of the best fan fiction stories j have ever read! You are such a talented writer!
LORCAN LOVE ;) I love the ending! :) xxAuthor's Response: Thank you so much! :) Report Review
Hey I just found your stories the other day and this is the first story of yours that I have read: I am planning to read all of your stories, because I find with this fantastic story that you are an incredible author.
I am now off to read the next chapter'!
- haleeAuthor's Response: I'm glad you enjoy it. Thank you! :) Report Review
Thank you for giving me something great to read. It had been both interesting and different.
RHadleyAuthor's Response: Thank you very much :) Report Review
Author's Response: Uh. Where'd your review go? Report Review
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