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Review:marissa lily potter says:
Hey there!

I had fun reading this chapter. It was nice to see old faces come back in. I like how you've kept the Quidditch World Cup canon but added your own details into it. I really like how you introduced the old characters like George, Ginny, Harry, Ron and Hermione to us.

Speaking of Hermione though, what's going on between her and Krum?? Haha that part really made me laugh.

Josh and Maddie seem more at ease with one another every chapter and I like that. The flow is a bit choppy in some places I think but that's because there's a lot of information to grasp onto at once. It's not awful but I thought I'd just mention that. :) I do like Josh and Maddie though and think that they feel really normal around one another. It's interesting to see that they do have an age gap but it doesn't stop them from being friends.

I really like how you introduced Ron to us. He was spot on and it made me laugh aloud at his abrasiveness. Ron is a funny character and you've done him justice so far. It's really great that you've started the World Cup right from the beginning! I always wondered what it would be like and now I get to read it through your story, which is lovely!

I hope Maddie meets new people. I like that her friendship with Josh is stable but with him starting his job at the World Cup, I feel like she might be bored so I hope she meets new people to be able to hang out with. Maddie is so open to magic and I'm pleased with the way you've written her to handle it. She's awed but also accepting. It's really fun to read Maddie's scenes and I'm very curious to see where her relationship with Josh goes haha.

This chapter had moments where it kept me interested and then others moments where I felt myself losing interest but, I think that's because of the back and forth dialogue without much description at the end. It was a little hard to follow with so many people talking at once but it wasn't too difficult. I did like the dialogue though and I thought it was really funny!

You've got a great start to this story and you're a fantastic writer. I had a pleasure being able to review your story!


Author's Response: Hello Marissa!

Thank you for reviewing :) I'm glad you enjoy the story, it feels great to read nice things about the story i put my heart into :)) Yes, the old characters are back - how could they not be, it's the World Cup ;)

And thank you for pointing out the flaws of my story, these are great tips for my future chapters!

I probably should have started with that, but THANK you so much for this: "you're a fantastic writer", that's so nice of you!


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