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Review:nott theodore says:
Hi Margaret! I saw this in the recently added pages a couple of days ago and have been meaning to get round to reading and reviewing it. I really enjoyed this chapter!

I think that your characterisation of all the canon characters is really great in this story. Demelza's more of a minor character in the series but I like the way that she takes the main stage in this story and with that you remind us that it's not just the people who fought in the battle and went through all of that who suffered afterwards. You've fleshed her out really well and made her a very real and believable character too in this story, especially with the way that you mention certain memories she has and link her into all the canon events.

I really like the way that you portray Ginny in this story too! I think a lot of people just characterise her as someone who's blunt and down-to-earth, but it's great to see this more caring side of her as well. It's good for Demelza to have someone her own age that she can relate to over these events and I really like the way that Ginny's decided to stick by her and help her as much as she can - and it's not just for the Quidditch team, either :P The way that she visits her in the hospital wing and the simple touches like spending her afternoon in the dormitory with her doing homework so that Demelza's got some company are just so sweet and in character, I think. Ginny's the sort of person that does look out for others and tries to help them when she can. I'm so pleased that Demelza's got someone like her fighting in her corner!

Hermione was really nicely written too. I think it's in character for her to try and help someone like Demelza even though she doesn't know her that well, just because Ginny's told her about the problems that she's having. I can imagine her being forgiving of what Demelza's done and understanding why she's done it, and I think that's really good for Demelza to know, that somebody is prepared to move past what she's done and help her instead. Plus, I love the idea of Hermione reading up on all the trauma responses and psychological suffering that people might experience after something like the war. It's just so like her!

You did a brilliant job of portraying Demelza's struggle with the PTSD as well. I love the fact that you didn't write it as though everything was suddenly okay as soon as she'd admitted her problem, because I've seen that in some stories and it frustrates me so much. Obviously admitting that she's got a problem is a massive step because now she can go about trying to get better, but I'm really pleased that you wrote about the fact she's still struggling to face up to what she's done and the consequences of that. I thought the way that you tied her house in during this chapter was brilliant, because she doesn't feel like she belongs because of what she's done but Ginny reminds her that she can get past this because of who she is. I really liked that!

The final section with the Quidditch training was really enjoyable to read because it's one of the only things we actually know about Demelza from the books, and seeing the way that it can be used for her to get better, and to distract from all the problems that she's been having, is great. I liked the fact that Ginny's imposed the new rule about helping people who have problems rather than judging them as well! This chapter ended on a really hopeful note and I'm glad to see that Demelza's got a sort of goal now and can look forward to something happier in the future!

Sian :)

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the amazingly detailed review. I'd say it's one of the longest I've ever got.

Oh, I hate it when a character recovers from trauma immediately once they've admitted it or fall in love or take a potion or whatever. It just seems to take from what has gone before and ruins the credibility for me. My fault is more likely to lie in the opposite direction - drawing things out indefinitely.

Glad you liked how I portrayed the more major canon characters.

Was it Ron who said at some point that going to the library is how Hermione responds to any crisis? So I would imagine that if she found herself experiencing trauma symptoms or realised any of her friends were, her first reaction would be to find out all she could about it.

I kind of felt Ginny's comment in Order of the Phoenix hinting at how she felt about being enchanted by Voldemort would give her an insight into how it felt to be forced into doing something you consider morally wrong, even if the method by which she was made to do so was very different.

Thank you so much again for the review. I didn't expect anything like that.


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