Omg... Teh, this is the most brilliant. I think I saw it appear in the recently added list a while back, but I didn't realise it was you! Ahh I just love everything about it. You had me at the line "drunk old man reincarnated as a princess."
So... My prediction: Jo is going to be (or secretly already is) a musician. Because they all die at 27.
Lavender Brown and Padma Patil. Thereís quite a story behind how they got together -- YES THERE IS AND YOU WROTE IT AND IT'S BRILLIANT! Hah, I love the reference to A Lightness here. How meta. (Ps, so Lavender didn't die at the end of that! I always did wonder. :P )
Nora can see the past. What a unique ability. It's almost like she can tell when it's already raining. Sidenote, I love that James is a renowned fortune teller. And I loved your (not so) sly dig at sensationalised media with all the couple names (Jellie.. haha) and the headlines of the Daily Prophet. ELDEST SON OF HARRY POTTER TO HIT THE THREE BROOMSTICKS ON AUGUST 31st. -- just, pure gold.
One Dimension. God, this is hilarious. WHERE DID THIS FIC COME FROM?
TELEPATHIC MOULD. I REALLY JUST CAN'T WITH THIS STORY.
I sympathise with her about having to work on her birthday, though. Sidenote: What exactly IS her job? I think she has a lot of fancy words but no actual job. :P
It used to be the Carkett Close Apothecary, but then the owner turned twenty-seven and got run over by the Knight Bus. -- Aahaha. There is something so hilariously blunt in the way Jo narrates it and throws in the random tidbits about dying, it reminds me a little of Kurt Vonnegut. (and that's a huge compliment as I love Vonnegut)
The bar is owned by clowns. Of course. I'm learning to not be surprised by anything in this story because it's all so mad. All the clowns names had me laughing out loud. And the fact that anytime Sleazy speaks, he is accompanied by the adverb "sleazily." Hahaha
Lysander Scamander! Ooh, this is going to be good. I love him already, how he's wearing blindingly bright yellow robes. And look, there's DENNIS CREEVEY! I appreciated his cameo in here. I think he's been in like 95% of your fics. :D
Sorry this review degenerated into ASKJLDLFJKWH-ing, but I really have no words. This fic is completely brilliant and mad and I have no idea how it even ended up existing, but whatever you did, keep doing it. I'm favouriting this for sure. ♥
Author's Response: Kristin! ♥
You've discovered my *cough* not so secret story, which I've been trying to shove under the table and let nobody see. :P Bahaha, thanks for this awesome and lovely shouty review! Love it when reviewers hit capslock.
Teehee, I had this story floating about my brainspace for some time, and only when I signed up for that challenge did I sit down to write it and I did try to fit that weird and wacky prompt in.
Jo a musician? :O She doesn't sound particularly musically gifted to me. :P Look, she doesn't even like One Dimension, a band that almost everybody in the wizarding world loves!
THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF META IN THIS FIC. BECAUSE MORE META IS BETA.
TELEPATHIC MOULD? THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF EVOLUTION IN THIS FIC AS WELL. AND CREATIONISM. AND EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN.
What is Jo's job indeed. The reason why she's being so obscure is because I hadn't decided while I was writing that chapter bahaha. Well, I've sort of decided now, I guess. This is a make-up-as-you-go sort of story. Planning-free! So I don't waste all my hours thinking of a coherent plot.
Ah, Vonnegut. So it goes, so it goes. :P
I have nothing to say about clowns. :P :P
And that /is/ Dennis Creevey indeed! You can always rely on him to turn up in the most unlikeliest of places.
Yeah, lol, I don't know how this ended up existing either, I don't even know how I myself ended up existing, or why anything else has...wait, a minute,,. EXISTENTIAL CRISIS.
You're favouriting this? Why would you do that?!?! You have a very...odd taste in fic.
THANK YOU KRISTIN ♥ ♥