Heya, here to spread the bursting love and, also, review for the House Cup 2014 :D
So, first of all, DO NOT MARK THIS AS ABANDONED!
This may be my inexperience in Next-Gen talking, but I've never heard of Deatheater Next-Gen and this first chapter already woke my Dramione feels and I am really looking forward to read about Scorpius and Rose struggling as Heads, falling in love, getting engaged and suffering through the allegations, hopefully staying strong and united, fighting to prove Scorpius' innocence and finally getting married to live happily ever after.
I would love to read that. :D (Even if the plot I just described seems a bit plain, it's the journey you'd take me on that interests me)
Second of all, where does Hermione get off telling Rose to mind her language when her man is being accused of being a Deatheater?! Shut it, mum, what do you know? Ack.
Thirdly, I'm sure Scorpius has a reason for staying quiet while being accused. Is he being blackmailed? What's the plan behind the shocking action?! He can't possibly really be a Deatheater, can he?
Did he approach Rose to get closer to the Weasleys and Potters?
Also, how did he manage to seduce her?
Aaah, so many questions left unanswered... This is going to drive me so nuts, I'll probably regularly come back to see if you've updated (if you do update, please tell me!!)
I have a feeling that Kingley's resignation has something to do with the whole plot and I am definitely smelling some kind of conspiracy cooking.
I love conspiracies!!
I really liked what you did with the Crappy Auror bit; you can totally have Rose mentally name him Crappy-Auror (you know, one word instead of the normal two) and maybe lead up to her nicknaming him like that? For example when Rose thinks about how Uncle Harry knew better but the other dude wanted to act on his own and losses were suffered because of his arrogance/stupidity, you could totally add something along the lines of: 'such a crappy auror does not deserve to be remembered through his actual name' or whatever feels appropriate to you :D
And why did Rose think of needing a gun (beyond being ready to run amok, of course^^) did she often watch westerns or shoot'em up movies? What's her connection to guns (it could be really fun and original!)
Also, what if she swears a bit? HER MAN IS BEING TAKEN AWAY, SHE HAS A RIGHT TO BE PISSED!
Anyway - I think this is an awesome first draft of a first chapter and that'll lead to an even more awesome plot, so CHOP-CHOP!
Get back to your very first noir WIP ♥ if you want/need to brainstorm on this one, PM me anytime. If you just needed a motivating push, I hope I managed just that.
I mean, if you're thinking of marking this as abandoned because of some 'Yeah but I don't like that' airhead-comment, it would be a real shame, because every story needs, nay, WANTS to be told. You are bound to encounter a few people here and there that'll complain that you're not writing what they want to read - but that doesn't mean you're doing anything wrong or bad.
The variety of genres, likes and dislikes make the world go round and keep it pretty... But the unique soul of the one is the most beautiful art :)
Rose and Scorpius, you gave them a story, gave them a life and threw them in a mad, twisted plot (just writing this, I'm itching to read more). It is your duty to help them see it through :D
Okay, enough of me being pushy (I apologize if that bothered you^^)
UPDATE THIS STORY!