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Review:bellatrixlestrange123 says:
Hi there, I'm here with your requested review!

Firstly, I think I might know what's causing your gap problems. It sometimes has to do with the processor you use to write your text before you paste it onto the site. You can try to press the 'paste from word' or 'paste as plain text' at the top of the text box in which you pasta the chapter into. If that doesn't work you should try using the simple editor. This was you can manually create spaces wherever you want of whatever size. The simple editor is more time consuming but worthwhile once you get rid of the pesky gaps :P

(Oh - I have a character called Maeve in my fic too - Yay for Maeve!)

Anyway, on with the review! I've tried to split this up into the sections you mentioned in your 'areas of concern' just so I get all the points covered that you asked for.

Readability: The gaps are just something that all of us have experienced from time to time (technology eh) and they're easily fixed so don't worry too much about them. I found that they didn't jar the readability of the chapter at all so they weren't of much bother. Aside from that, there were a few typos such as a 'he' should have been a 'she' and just other stuff that can again, be easily fixed if you have a BETA look it over for you. There just a few grammar mistakes that can also be easily fixed this way. If you don't want to get a BETA reader, there are hundreds of on-line editing sites just waiting to be found! 'Paper Rater' is a particularly good one as it lists all spelling/grammar/syntax errors of the whole text. Aside from that, you sentence lengths were just the right size and there weren't any sentences that were too long and you had a variety of sentence structures in there too!

Plot devolpment - No complaints here - your writing is effortlessly beautiful and because of this you wrote the plot without flaw as it developed. For the reader, I think that it was clear from the outset that this family were maybe not Maeve's real one and you added to this element with a lot of clarity - well done!

As far as reader interest goes, I cannot wait to find out what happens next!! Who is this mysterious woman? What happened to Maeve? Ah I love it!

Bella :)

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