Hi! I'm here for review tag!
So, I'm already really interested in this story and I haven't even started reading it yet. The first sentence, the way you start the story off with Dialogue just pulled me right in. I really like that this is in Peter's POV. The way you've written him is wonderful. I can sense his panic, and then distate at who is talking to him. I can only imagine what Snape has plans to do. I'm intrigued and scared and stopping to actually write down what I'm thinking while I'm reading this is so tough because I don't want to stop reading.
Ooh, so it's set in the middle of the books. I probably could've known that by looking at the details of the story. Oh well, it was fun finding it out while I was reading. I love that even though Peter has betrayed his friends, and he's on his own, he still reverts to his school boy ways in the way he treats Snape. I think it's interesting and really believable. Disdain for someone doesn't just go away because you're both "working" for the same person. Great job there.
Okay, why is Peter there, and why is he supposed to be there. OH WAIT I KNOW. Okay, I'm on the same page now. We're good, we're good. Ignore my rambling, I promise the end of this review will make more sense (probably, maybe. Okay no promises). HAHA. HAHAHA. Oh my gosh, Snape insulting Pettigrew when he's asking who did it to him. That's great. Priceless. Wonderful wonderful wonderful banter there, brilliant characterization. I can actually SEE this scene in my mind.
Peter is a slippery slippery snake. How was he not a Slytherin?? Even I'm terrified of the Dark Lord in this. Normally I can seperate myself out, and just not be afraid of him, but you've pulled me so far into the story I have goosebumps at the idea of what Voldemort would do. I LOVE the description of Peter not wanting Snape into his mind. The way you have him listing off people, and saying it as if he's some kind of god at Legilimency. Brilliant.
Again, I love Snape. I don't normally read fics about death eaters, or Snape. But this is just, woah. This makes me WANT to read stories about death eaters, and Snape and Voldemort. This is just amazing. Wonderful. Incredible. I'm only halfway through, how is this even possible? Stop being talented, it's not fair.
I love the mention of the Marauders. That Peter still thinks of them, even though he knows he's done terrible things that they could never in a million years forgive him for, even if they were all alive. He kind of reminds me of a schoolboy trying to impress his friends, again. I almost kind of pity him and his lack of just... Being. I agree with Snape, he truly is pathetic and mediocre. And he's definitely not getting the best of Severus, there's a catch to this. There has to be.
Ugh. I hate Peter so much. I love the way you've written this whole scene though. The way that Snape went in, and the way he's so condescending to Peter even in thoughts. Peters memories, the way he's looking back in on them too and thinking about them. It kind of feels like a game being played back and forth. Good regret it you big meany. (for lack of better 12+ words to use). Ugh, the idea of crying baby Harry makes me want to cry. STOP EVOKING EMOTIONS IT'S NOT FAIR.
YES. I LOVE THIS. YAY. HURT HIM. HURT HIM SNAPE. I'm violent. Woah, what have you done. I'm not normally this violent. Oh. My. God. That ending. How. What. You're brilliant. I don't even. How can I even say coherent things after that awesome of an ending!! Oh this is so great. You should definitely get back into the swing of writing more, because this is just incredible.
Your descriptions literally pulled me into the story and grabbed me by the throat and had me so entirely captivated through the story. And your characterization. I could feel the honesty and the believability of the characters you wrote. Everyone made sense, they fit with what JKR gave us. I am absolutely in love with the way you wrote this, and the effort you put into this. This story makes me want to stalk your author page forever. I'm sorry this review is so useless, but I don't have anything constructive to say, there's nothing you could do to make this better. It's simply amazing. Woah this review is long.
xoxo Sarah ♥
Author's Response: Hi, Sarah!
If at all possible, I like to drop the reader right into the story without any unnecessary setup. I think it's the best way to get people engaged right away. Since Peter doesn't really know much of anything about his circumstances, I wanted to put the reader in a similar situation.
This story is set some time after the battle in the Department of Mysteries and before Narcissa and Bellatrix show up at Snape's house in Spinner's End. It's not clear from the books how much of the summer Peter spent there, so I didn't really specify it down to the day or week. I enjoyed playing with which parts of Peter's character would have changed and which parts would have stayed the same. I agree about his attitude toward Snape.
I'm really pleased that you could see the scene playing out in your mind. I had a certain imagine of the back-and-forth going on in Snape's sitting room and I'm never quite sure whether anyone else visualizes it the same way.
I still don't think Peter belonged in Slytherin. He's cunning, but only to an extent. As you'll see...
Ha! There are definitely people who write a better Snape than me, although I do enjoy writing him. This story was different than the situations I usually have him in, though. It was a chance to have some fun with his darker side.
I sort of doubt that Peter ever stopped thinking about what might have been. We'll never know -- well, unless JKR writes something about it on Pottermore or elsewhere -- exactly why Peter decided to betray his friends, but we do know that they were all once closer than brothers. I doubt even selling your soul to Voldemort could completely wipe that away.
And finally we get to the real truth of what's been happening all along. I don't mind one bit that you ended up hating Peter. He deserved no less. The thought of poor Harry crying for his slain parents pretty much cements things for me.
Ha! Yes! Kick him some more while you've got him down! I see that you and I have very similar thoughts on how Snape *should have* treated Peter. I just can't imagine that Snape had Peter all alone for some amount of time and he didn't take that opportunity to exact vengeance on the man who took the love of his life away from him.
Thank you for all of the kind words. This was an idea that I'd had floating around in my head for a long time, and it did get me back into the flow of writing, at least for a little while. Now I've kind of lost it again. :( Reviews like this definitely help, though. (: Thanks so much!