Hi, Beth! Once again tagging you from Review Tag!
I still want to know what you've done to my Rosie, but I'm feeling a lot better about things after this chapter. I really enjoyed seeing Rose be able to enjoy this moment of connection with another person, especially since it was Scorpius. It's obviously something that's been missing from her life for too long, and even such a short way into the story it felt good to share that moment with her.
But I'm getting a little ahead of myself. I love the idea of James, Al and Scorpius rocking the bachelor pad. Al is obviously not as much of a bachelor as the other two, but James seems to more than make up for it. He invites the entire Cannons team, all of the Auror and Healer trainees AND every female in the Hogwarts graduating class to their party? I think you can't help but admire the ambition. And after all that, he lands the sexy American witch that his father more or less set him up with. He sure can put on a show.
I really liked the way you built up a nice, casual comfort between Rose and Scorpius. You let them be friends first, enjoying a few laughs at the expense of Molly, Wolfram and the other party guests. There was no animal magnetism going on, which was good because that wouldn't have felt very natural for Rose at all. It's sort of like the two of them are alone in the middle of this giant party. I've been there; it can be a fun place to be.
Dom and Freddy are obviously stone cold players. Especially Freddy. Three young ladies at once? The boy has game. ;)
I'm definitely curious about this brute who tries to grab Rose. Aside from the obvious, how on earth did he manage to disparate away after being put in a body bind by an Auror trainee? Is there something more going on here than meets the eye?
Aww, Scorpius really steps up and defends Rose's modesty. He's a true gentleman!
I like what you did with his characterization in this chapter, too. He has a few personality quirks -- some might go so far as to say flaws -- as well. Once he gets in this protective frame of mind, he doesn't seem to be able to dial it back. He gets completely carried away with his anger and only Rose is able to pull him back. In doing so, she opens herself up to him in a way that felt really healthy for her. Gah, it felt like we were so close to a kiss there at the end!
The only thing I would suggest for this chapter was that the f-bombs got a little excessive in places. I don't have anything against the word in general, it just felt a bit gratuitous in a few instances.
Otherwise, awesome chapter! You made my Rosie feel better. This makes me happy!
Author's Response: Hi Dan!
I love, love, love your reviews! As far as your Rosie goes... it might get a little more dicey before it gets better (fair warning)! The three guys are pretty much best pals, so they are going to have a blast in their bachelor pad - however, living arrangements might change at some point (hint, hint).
Thanks for noticing the characterization. I think that is the part that I worked on the most - other than the mystery plot, so I'm so happy that you noticed.
There may just be something else going on with that weird guy who grabbed your Rosie. How exactly did that wizard manage to apparate away? Weird, huh?
I hope you like a flawed (some might say damaged) Scorpius - because if you read on, you will not be disappointed. He has legitimate reasons for being moody and angry.
I went back an re-read the chapter myself (it has actually been a while since I posted it) and I agree with you about the language. I think I was just trying to figure how twenty year-olds would speak around their friends. I was trying to figure out where to land between being realistic and moving the story along.
I would like to say don't worry too much about your Rosie, but the story is mainly about her, and it can't be ALL perfect the whole way through, can it? However, I can promise you that I love her just as much as you do - so just keep that in mind...
Thanks again so much for this wonderful review!