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Review:kenpo says:
Hello Kiana!

I'm excited to read this. I've seen it mentioned a few times on the forums, and it's seemed like a cool story. That and, you wrote it, so it'll be good because you're an amazing writer.

I have the feeling that I'm going to have a lot to gush about (you said you wanted feedback... so I might try to find some really nitpicky CC, but don't count on it), so I'm going to go section my section.




I love the description of the boatman. The way you framed all the details puts Sirius's pain in perspective, somehow. I don't know how to say this...
He could be thinking about his misery, but he's just focusing on the beard. It's... very sad.

I always think one of the most heartbreaking parts of Sirius's story is his unwavering loyalty to his friends. Imagining him sitting there, just thinking about how much he misses them hurts. I can't imagine what his life was like... I really don't want to know.

It's so intense that he counts the time by days since they died. I can't imagine living life like that. That's the building blocks of a miserable existence.

I love that you thought to mention Bellatrix. On top of digging really deeply into Sirius's character, you've added some characterisation for her.

You do such a beautiful job capturing this character. His hatred for Wormtail is obviously justified, but you portray it as this obsession that's just really fascinating.

And, then, at the end, it's like this little glimmer of hope when he figures out where Wormtail is. I liked his musings about how rat-like he is.

I'm glad that at least Sirius was happy for a little bit... the way his life went makes me so sad, just thinking about all the heartbreak...

You've done a beautiful job with this. I can't tell you that enough. This is a fairly short story, but you've captured so much into it, and packed so much intense desperation.

Never stop writing.


-Huffleclaw/Ravenpuff Eggstravaganza-

Author's Response: Hi Georgia! weofherogpegr, you are so nice! I don't know how to respond other than typing out random letters but that's not really a proper review response so I will attempt something coherent!

I am ready!!!


Whoo, I can hear the starting gun! (ok, I got a little too into that.)

I know, I mean, beards are pretty awesome and all and need love, but I think it was the only way Sirius could maintain some sort of sanity by forgetting about his own problems during that journey but focusing on other people's instead.

I know, it's so sad!!! Especially with Remus, because he's probably just doesn't get why Remus hates him and doesn't understand why it was Peter. I'm glad that you liked Bella, she was a fun cameo to do, because while he's there wallowing about the loss of his friends, he can still make jibes at his cousin and that was a lot of fun to do!

Hahah, I think it's because I'm studying Freud's ideas on obsessional neurosis right now, so it's sort of seeping into my writing, but I'm glad you liked it, because the idea of obsessions has always interested me. Then Sirius' idea of one was so different here it was fun to delve into his mind.

I know, his life is just the biggest angst fest around, but at least we know that people realised he was innocent after he died, so that's some small sort of comfort even though it wasn't when he was alive.

Thank you for such an amazing review, you are seriously amazing, and lovely, and I would do :wub: but it doesn't work here so ♥ ♡ ♥ will have to make up for it! :D


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