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Review:MargaretLane says:
Well, Madame Pomfrey is the matron, so it was a bit confusing. I was rereading to see if Madame Pomfrey was there and I'd missed something.

And yeah, it does make sense there'd be resentment against ex-Death Eaters which could lead to prejudice against their kids. I never thought of future mysteries involving retaliation against them, but it does make sense.

*laughs* Albus, Rose and Scorpious always seem to be in trouble in this story.

Yikes, it sounds like Lucius Malfoy might have sent that Howler and it sounds like he has something pretty unpleasant in store for his grandson.

I really like the fact that Rose and Albus feel differently about Scorpious in this story. Usually he seems to either be friends with both of them or disliked by both of them, so this really distinguishes them as characters.

You've one character say "you're older sister is a Ravenclaw", when it should be "your".

Lavender's mum must have started having kids fairly young. Assuming her mum is Parvati, who'd only be what? 36 or 37 at this point? A lot of people in the wizarding world DO seem to marry young, even allowing for the fact that England (and in fact most places in the world) tend to marry earlier on average than we do.

Oooh, looks like there's a fair share of prejudice against werewolves hanging on in this story, which isn't surprising. I wonder if that'll be relevant.

For a moment, when the prejudice against werewolves came up, I was thinking "I wonder if somebody in this is a werewolf," then I thought "nah, why should they be?" but now that Zabini appears to be collecting Wolfsbane, I'm wondering again. I even wonder if he's a werewolf himself.

And it's rather interesting that the attacks HAVEN'T been done by a werewolf. I'm beginning to think they are being done by a witch or wizard who is simply cursing the victims to make it look as if they've been attacked by a Dark creature.

It would be easy enough to find out if a werewolf could be involved by checking if there was a full moon on the dates of the attacks, though of course if the villain is trying to fake werewolf attacks, they'd probably do their crimes on a full moon, so being on a full moon wouldn't NECESSARILY mean it was a werewolf. If the attacks weren't on full moons though, you could virtually rule it out, as I very much doubt werewolves like Greyback who attack in human form are common. Worth checking out anyway.

*sympathises with Albus for not missing Potions* This reminds me of when I was in 1st year (equivalent to Hogwarts' 2nd year, though, as we start secondary a year later than the British) and it snowed. They sent us home after our second class because so few people turned up for school (in Ireland, even a sprinkling of snow pretty much shuts down the country) and one of the two teachers we should have had for our first two classes was absent, presumably unable to get in either. The one teacher I did have was the one I was most scared of, to the point I used to sometimes feel sick before her classes.

Hmm, now I'm getting suspicious of Cho Chang. Just because of that reference to her sounding nervous. That has to mean something. And she could DEFINITELY have a reason to want revenge on the Death Eaters, for Cedric's death. I mean, I guess it's a bit unlikely she'd still be that obsessed with a teenage boyfriend, but considering he was murdered, I don't think it's impossible. Your boyfriend being murdered when you're only 15 or 16 is the sort of trauma that could have long term impacts.

You've an extra apostrophe after the word "didn't" towards the end of the story.

Author's Response: HELLO!

I'm really sorry that its taken me so long to get back to you but I've been really busy and for some reason, my internet connection hates me a lot. D':

So, on to this monster!

I refer to Madame Pomfrey as the matron somewhere in this chapter, I think but maybe I didn't use this word correctly? Hm...

Albus and Scorpious will ALWAYS be in trouble for this story. Hahah. I don't think that will be something that I'll change, to be honest. Its just too funny!

Rose and Albus are two completely different people and I think their views really stem from what they've heard from their parents. Rose may have heard a lot about the Malfoy's from her father and you know how Ron is about Malfoy while Harry is more forgiving. Albus himself isn't the sort of person to hold deep grudges either so I'm glad that you liked that about them. I didn't want them to be all the same just because they were related.

Lavender's Mama is Parvati and I think she did start having babies fairly young, probably after the War was over.

There is a lot of werewolf prejudice in this story and stop giving away my secrets, you! You're solving this mystery faster than I am, no one is supposed to know any of this stuff about witches and wizards having something to do with the murders. Shsh!

Hahha.

Albus will never like Potions. I mean, never. It always reminded me of Biology, which was something that I hated when I was in school so it just sort of passed on to this poor soul as well. Plus, I think its funny that Harry's poor skills at Potions passed on to his kids too. Hahha. Also, writing about funny potions is fun and I can come up with weird names that no one will question. Hahha.

Suspicious of Cho?! How could you be suspicious of her? Haha. I think she was more nervous about the kids being in danger than anything but you never know...you might be on to something. Haha, I think having someone you love being murdered would leave a scar on your heart so you're right about that one.

Thanks for the critique too! I hadn't looked through this well enough in a long time so its much appreciated!

Much love,

Gabbie


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