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Review:Penelope Inkwell says:
Hey Monica!

Hooray! I get less free time than Iíd like, but Iím back and Iím reading and reviewing! And to answer your previous question, no, you didnít request reviews. I just like your story ;)

I enjoy the way you write Draco and Anaís dialogue. Itís snappy and funny and it sounds true to their characters. I laugh at pretty much every interaction between them.

"the scene outside began looking more like a smeared, gray watercolor painting.Ē
--this was a lovely image

Interesting. So Anaxandraís afraid of storms. Well, I suppose itís good she has a weakness, for character purposes. Usually sheís so tough. I also like how Draco was kind of a jerk about it, because itís not what I would have anticipated. So many times, this would be when the heroine shows her weakness, and the hero demonstrates his softer side. And this isnít that at all. Itís true to his character--Draco may be a better guy now, but heís not perfect, and Ana hasnít done much to endear herself to him at this point. His reaction makes sense, and defies expectation. And I like both of those things in a story :D

Also, I like how she makes him coffee. They canít even do nice things for one another without a whole internal monologue. Itís kind of cute.


"the aching lonely of this room.Ē
--ďlonelyĒ should probably be ďloneliness"

"If there was anything she hated more, it was thunderstorms. Correction: if there was anything she hated more it was the fact that she was afraid of thunderstorms.Ē
--When you say, ďhated moreĒ, more than what? The rain? I didnít quite get that.

Really liked this chapter, and am totally shipping the two main characters. Also, you paint some very pretty pictures with your words. Nice work!


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