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Review:Lululuna says:
Hi Adi! :)

Wow, I love this so much! There's so much eerie mystery and beautiful writing and gah. I'm so confused and curious about what's going on, and I can't wait to find out more.

First of all, I like how you began the story with the two Muggle men. It was a very JKR-ish move in that I don't think they are characters in the story beyond that scene, but they set up the atmosphere and the danger immediately.

Snow, like a deceptive veil, hid all the graying stones with teary epitaphs; it masked death in its beauty and obscured the vision of decaying bones beneath the earth.This line, like all the images describing the graveyard, was gorgeous. I have this image of a poetic narrator stepping back and whispering this story in my ear and making all these things become vivid and illuminated. The ominous stillness of the graveyard, the blanket of snow, the chill and danger in the air... beautiful writing.

It's very interesting that the men didn't want to speak of it again, that what they saw frightened them so. That makes me think that the two bodies have something extra sinister about them, as the men don't call the police or speak of it or anything. I wonder who the people are - right now I'm a little worried they might be Harry and Ginny, going to visit Harry's parents' graves, but I'm not sure! Who could the knife belong to, and why not a wand? Hmm.

The two bodies neither looked like friends, nor enemies. This was such a unique description to make and took me a little farther away from thinking they were Harry and Ginny. But I suppose that could be the nature of death - the dead are never friends or enemies, they are just dead.

Maggie Bagshot poking her head out her window intrigues me. I wonder if she is perhaps Bathilda's illegitimate daughter, or some sort of manifestation or ghost? Either way, she seems very chilling. I suspect her. :P Your descriptions of her were beautiful as well, with the image of the window, and how lonely she is and how she misses her husband, along with the spooky idea of him being in the graveyard. Everything comes back to the graveyard, doesn't it?

This is an amazing start, Adi! I can't wait to read on when you update, I'll be keeping an eye out! :) ♥

Gry/Sly Battle Round 2 - Review 7 of 15

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