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Review:HEG says:
HI! This is HEG here for the challenge review :).

You've DEFINETLY made a good start on this story. You have used really interesting words and sentences. I love the way you don't know who they are talking about until the very last sentence. It creates a good sense of mystery which I like. It's good to have a bit of mystery in the story, I don't like it when you can predict everything that's going to hAppen.

Second of all, I love the way that you've written your story in the second person. I think the second person is particularly hard to write in so you've done well in that. I have only read a second person story once before and I think yours tops it.

This a very imaginative idea that you have thought of and I really like it. It's good because I don't know who's speaking. At first I thought that it was Slytherin but then it said Sazalar would eat them like monks on every single day of the year so I changed my mind. I did think that it could've been Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw but it didn't seem like the tone of voice that they'd speak in if you get what I mean?

Also I noticed that you've put stomachesches rather than stomachs.

I really love this story. Every single aspect of it! I hope you continue in the same way and I will be reviewing all the other chapters that you put up. I hope they 're great!

HEG :)

Author's Response: Hello! Thanks for being so prompt with your review!! :D

Awww, you're so nice!! I'll admit that I wasn't truly intending on being mysterious, but I guess that concealing the character's name until the last sentence does kind of add some mystery to it. :)

This is my first attempt at second person POV, so I'm glad to hear that you think I did pretty well with it!! Thanks so much!

Yep, it could only be Godric Gryffindor. The song that inspired this story was so brassy and bold that I immediately fixed on Gryffindor as the subject.

Whoops!! Quick editing got the best of me! I'll fix that. :)

Thanksthanksthanks!! :D


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