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Review:adluvshp says:
Blackout Battle!

So, I think this was a good start to your story. I like your choice of song for the story as it suits the mood. Hermione and Draco are a little OOC here but that's a given since this is a dramione and its post-war.

However, I think this chapter could definitely be better if you included some backstory on Hermione & Draco, in the form of flashback or plain narration, of their situations and thoughts after the war and how they came to be in the present situation. Ideally it should be in the first chapter, but you could always include it later on (in the first few chapters preferably) so it builds a setting for the plot. Your grammar and sentence phrasing could also do with some improvement so I guess it'd be better if you could get a beta.

Apart from that, all I have to say is, keep writing. As you write, you improve. I am sure the plot you have in mind is interesting and I can see the story going in a good direction. This first chapter made for a nice read and I like the idea of Draco helping Hermione against her bad relationship with Ron.

Good work,
Cheers,
AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: Hey,
thanks for the ideas, I'll definitely think about that while continuing the story. I wasn't that happy with my first chapter, but I didn't really know what it was that was missing.
Yeah, maybe some native speaker could help me improve in some points.

Thanks for reviewing,
schneeflocke


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