Hello again! It's BookDinosaur here with your requested review from the forums. Sorry for the slight delay. :)
I really enjoyed reading this chapter! I have to say, even though I haven't read up to this point yet, I could read through the whole chapter without much confusion at all, pretty much everything makes sense and I was really glad for that, so kudos to you there!
I think, even though we only have a short couple of paragraphs at the beginning, Lily's interaction and bantering with her friends was really natural and realistic. I love the banter that went on between her and Alice, I could tell straight away that they were really good friends and all their dialogue was perfect for that, so well done.
Hehe, of course James' first words in this chapter were about Quidditch and Quidditch strategies! I really love how you've characterised him here, he does seem really laidback and in love with Lily, I enjoyed reading the two of them together so much. You did a great job with showing their relationship and love for each other. :D
I think the argument between Snape and Lily was really well done. If I'd tried to write an argument between them, t would have turned out long, boring, preachy, and I'd have had to edit it all out. Thankfully, yours ended up nothing like that. You managed to get the you're awful and I hate you message across, give it enough length not to seem too short and not too long as to be boring and preachy, so well done and major kudos to you there. :D
I think the way that Snape tried to pin his lost friendship on James, it's so Snape-like of him and definitely something I can see him doing, that was a lovely touch.
All in all, this chapter was really lovely. I enjoyed reading it and I'm so glad I had the chance to! :D
Author's Response: Hello! Sorry for my late reply, I've been busy writing/editing!
I'm so happy you didn't feel lost during this chapter! I really wanted to request reviews for some of these later bits, but I know it's hard to ask someone to critique a chapter when they haven't read the entire fic ... but this one I thought was ok to request, because everyone knows/loves the story of James and Lily :D
Funny thing about Alice ... I accidentally named her Alice Cooper, thinking the name had a nice ring to it, and found out later that it sounded familiar because there's an American rockstar with the same name. I thought about making her goth and as a joke, but ended up not going with that plot piece ... so I made her a jokester instead. She's basically Lily's only good girl friend, so I wanted to make their relationship playful and fun!
And James, oh James. He talks about Quidditch because I wanted to make a smooth transition to the next chapter (the final Quidditch match of the season), but I also know he was a Quidditch fanatic, so I thought it added to his character. Similarly, I wanted to show how easy/fun their relationship is, simply because it ties into a fight in the next chapter >:)
That's supposed to be an evil smiley. Oh well.
The argument was probably the toughest part, so it makes me very happy you like it! It was kind of based on things I wish I could tell my ex-boyfriend, but I translated it to Lily's situation to make it more "canon". And yeah, Snape's a little bugger, so I knew he'd try and blame James somehow :D
Thanks so much for the review, it was extremely helpful!!