Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:MargaretLane says:
Again a very intriguing chapter title. You are good at coming up with titles likely to create suspense and make people wonder what the chapter will be about. I've a feeling the Riddle House isn't likely to be a good place to be.

Perhaps the Sapphire of Slytherin is there. But then, if Voldemort had access to that, he'd have made a Horcrux out of it. And I doubt his Muggle family would have had access to it if he didn't. Or maybe they would. Maybe Morfin gave it to Tom Riddle as a gift, a token of her love. Or maybe it is a Horcrux and Voldemort isn't completely dead. So many possibilities.

It sounds as if there is something missing at the beginning of this chapter. I think the last chapter ends with somebody calling "Albus Severus Potter" and then this one begins with him responding to some mention of Riddle House, but I haven't heard any mention of it. It sounds like whatever was said to him is missing. Maybe you meant it to be confusing.

I'm now not sure whether to trust Cho or not. It's possible she suspects Scorpius, possibly even with good reason and is truly trying to protect Albus, but it's also possible she's involved with whoever the villains here are.

The line about "not only guarding the dangers of Sirius Black" should really have a "from" between the word "guarding" and the word "the".

*cheers for him managing to escape*

And poor Albus, he shouldn't blame himself. He'd no way of knowing Cho wasn't to be trusted.

Author's Response: hello again.
I'm sure that you remember Cho as a really nice character in the Harry Potter books but in this story she is portraited as a villan but she might or might not have an explanation.

So you have read past the bit where he escapes? Yes there are so many possibilities.

Probably my favorite chapter is "the letter" it's really interesting and you want to know what will happen. I wonder what you'll think of it.

Thanks for pointing out the mistakes that I have made I will change them today; now

From HEG
:-)



Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 668
Submit Report: