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Review:UnluckyStar57 says:
Hi! I'm here with your requested review! :)

You asked me to check out flow/general interest level, but here's the thing: I think that it all flows very well, and I'm EXTREMELY interested in this story. So I can't speak for the population at large, but I personally believe that this story is going to turn out very strangely--and VERY awesome-ly. :)

So, since I've addressed my opinions on your Areas of Concern, I'll just start in on the story now.

Characters:

Wren continues to be a strong female lead. It's good to know that she's real enough to be unsettled by the move from the country to the city, and that she just wants her great-grandmother back. I find it very interesting (now that I think about it) that her name is Wren and she has an affinity for taking care of animals (and people). Did you choose that name for that purpose? :) I like that she stopped to talk to Dillon, even though she could've just minded her own business. That shows that she cares about more than just herself and the goings-on of her family. She isn't a selfish person, and she seems very different that the typical trope of the OC who is only concerned with hair/makeup/OMGAlbusPotter'seyes. So I really like that about her. :D

Augusta Longbottom makes me so sad. She was such a domineering, formidable witch in the HP series, and now, to see her like this... It's as if she's a totally different person--or that her mind is permanently somewhere else. Her body is stuck in reality, but her thoughts are God-knows-where. I feel terrible for her--that Alice and Frank's deaths should have affected her so much. :(

To be very honest, Dillon creeps me out a little bit. He's just this random kid who knows what the Gryffindor crest looks like, and his mother is AWOL, but she went to Hogwarts. And from the sound of it, he's a Squib, which is really sad for him, but that fact doesn't clear up all of the questions surrounding him. Where did he come from? Who is his sister? Does Wren know her? Why did his mother quit doing magic? Why does he feel like he needs to go to Hogwarts? (Does he not understand that he's a Squib?) And, most importantly, WHY does he have a box of rabbits?!?!?! The motif of rabbits is going to keep showing up time and time again, but I'm not very sure what's going on. I totally understand that *duh, silly* it's in the title, so it's got EVERYTHING to do with the story, but why do the bunnies keep popping up? They're breeding like rabbits! :D

I guess I'll just have to find out, won't I? :)

Grammar/Spelling&etc: Everything is perfect. You have betas, so I think they catch everything that you miss. That's a really, really good thing, because I LURVE stories that are grammatically sound and don't spl wrds liek dis (translation: don't spell words like this). So this story is perfect in that regard. :D

Plot Flow: I think that the plot is flowing very, very nicely at this point, as I said earlier in the review. Also, I don't think that the internal dialogue thing is totally fine. Now I have a better sense of who Wren is, and a very strange and fragmented sense of who Dillon is (but that's only because he was just introduced. I'll get to know more about him in future chapters, I'm sure!). All fine on this front. :)

Really, brilliant work on this story! It's so unique and unpredictable--I hardly know where it's going to go next (except maybe to Hogwarts--I think that they're probably going to Hogwarts next. I could be wrong, though.).

So, I'll review you next time? :)

~UnluckyStar57

Author's Response: Oh, man. You just made me feel ten times better about this chapter!

I'd started second-guessing myself (as I tend to do) about chapter content here. I might still go and make a few adjustments, but for now I think I'll carry on and give it time to sink in first. If you're interested and you want to keep reading, then this chapter did its job. Maybe I should stop fretting. :)

Cheers for strong female leads!! Ah, I didn't choose Wren's name specifically because she liked to take care of animals, though that would make sense, wouldn't it? I am happy that you like her name (and her image too!) because I did go for a little while not knowing who she was or what she looked like. But once that came together, it really came together in my mind. Now the name (and image) are inseparable, so I'm really glad you bought in on it. :)

Augusta makes me sad too. :( She's been through so much, and now she's like that. I hated having anything happen to her, but then where would my story be?? I will say that she gets to develop along with the story. Her condition won't be static, if that helps.

Speaking of names, for many months, Dillon didn't have one. I had to go back and add his name after I came up with it. Before he had one, I was calling him the "creepy little boy". Knowing that you (and others) are picking up on this makes me extremely pleased with him!

And oh, the rabbits! Yes, they are important. *points to title* Aren't they cute? Don't you WANT one??

Aww, shucks! I have the most awesome betas ever!! I'll have to gush over them again at some point, because they have done so much for this story!

Thanks so much for this awesome review! Yes, of course! You are most welcome to come back any time and share your thoughts with me!!!

Pix


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