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Review:Hogwarts27 says:
Hi. Another lovely chapter. I enjoyed the whole thing. I think your writing really good, and I especially enjoy all your descriptions. They're brief but very vivid, and you make every word count, which really works to paint a vivid picture in my mind.

There was one minor, really nit picky thing I noticed that I'll just mention, but it's nothing that couldn't be left alone. In fact, it may not even strike you as something that needs changing. In the paragraph where you describe Yvette, you've got two sentences in a row where you use the word 'although' to contrast the two sentence parts. Those two 'although's were a little repetitive to my ears, so you might consider rephrasing one of the sentences differently to eliminate the repetitive word.

I liked the reason you gave for why Wallburga chose to read muggle books, and the differences she noticed between muggle and wizard books. You logic made a lot of sense. There was also a nice balance of narration and dialogue in this chapter. The balance felt better than in the last chapter. There were a few new people Wallburga encountered, so it felt like the world we saw was slowly expanding, and the dialogue helped to add interest to the characters, and moved the action along in a natural way. I enjoyed the part with Slughorn, and I do hope there'll be a Slug club dinner party sometime down the road. I look forward to reading the next chapter whenever it's up.

Author's Response: Hi!

Ahh, an actual reader! You're following my story? Thanks so much! *squeals*

I will definitely change that nitpick;D thanks for pointing it out!

Thanks for the great compliments and comments! It means so much!

-Janelle


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