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Review:Pixileanin says:
Hi there! I'm tagging you from the Review Tag.

Wow, that was quite the prologue-esque first chapter! It had all kinds of teasers in it: what happened to her parents? Who did this horrible thing? Where is she going now? I don' t even think she has a clue. Her mother leaves her alone. She's just lost everything. Oh gosh. The tension!

I admire your fast-paced pulse-gripping action here. The uncertainty, the imminent danger, the screams and her mother acting completely irrationally and staying behind... wow. I felt the terror and the break-neck speed of it. I think the not knowing really heightened the emotional content of this scene, and it was all very effective.

That voice, the "come out, come out, wherever you are!". I can guess who that might be, but I'll keep that to myself for now. I could be wrong. There are some seriously twisted people behind this, I can feel it.

You really set this up as a "never look back" kind of story. Your character truly has nothing to look back at. It's all gone! You definitely delivered on the suspense.

This looks like an exciting pull to the next chapter. I will have to come back and see what happens next!

A great read!

Pix

Author's Response: Wow! That was fast! Haha

Thank you. Sadly, the following chapters move much slower than this, and only a few of my chapters have this fast-paced action type of thing going on. This is my first fic I've ever written, so I didn't really know how to go about developing the story and the characters. Now I've got my mind right, the last six chapters are a little better than the beginning :)

But I did get the reaction from you that I want from all my readers, which is suspense and anxiety. I'm glad that my description is very effective :)

Hope to see you back soon and thanks for reading :)

--Monica


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