Hey there - dropping by from the review battle! :) jumped in when I spotted you since you left those reviews on In Theory recently (which I absolutely loved and will reply to soon, I promise! :D) ;)
You know, it's strange, but I don't read that much femmeslash, mostly I think because I haven't found a ship to ship, if that makes sense, though I've read bits of Fleur/OFC and Luna/Ginny before.
I loved this, though. I loved how you didn't focus on the fact that they're two girls at all, that was almost sort of irrelevant, it was mostly about how they're best friends and Lily can't see, which I think fits really well with it being Next Gen, you know? They're at school in the 2020s - the world's going to be different from now then; things will have moved on.
I liked how even though this is a one-shot you still took the time to explain that Lily lost her sight and how they met when they were little and things, and then at the end that they spent so much of their lives together. It was really sweet, like a kinda story or flickbook of important moments, you know? It almost felt like Lily was telling it to someone else, in third person, almost, say James' kids or something.
You dealt so well with her being blind, as well. It's such a difficult thing to tackle, I think, because it's so hard to really understand properly what it's like for people who are blind, you know? But I think you did so well with it - you pointed out that things were harder for Lily, picked presents she's likely to get, mentioned things like how she couldn't see her clothes or her hair colour or Caitlin, which were all such wonderful details.
I love their characters as well. I love how Lily's nervous and wants to be able to see just for that moment, sort of, but so happy and really pretty darn brave, too. I loved how Caitlin is such a wonderful friend and seems so chirpy and patient and kind. They're such a lovely pair of characters, and they really feel so real, you know? :) Yeah, I really love them both. They're so adorable - apart and together!
Your writing, as well, is so lovely. Clear and just the right balance of description and action, it flows so easily... gah, so nice! :) There were a few formatting issues, but they're easy enough to tidy up and, frankly, they're not that big a deal ;)
So yeah, I loved this! I'm so glad I read this! :)
Author's Response: Hi hon! Thanks for this awesome review - I've taken so long to respond to it because I honestly didn't know how to respond to a lot of it! You're far too sweet :D
There isn't really a lot of femslash on the archives, so it's understandable that you haven't read a lot of it! As a pretty resolute lesbian myself I have kinda taken on the task of singlehanded changing that by writing quite a lot of it ;) I can honestly say I've never read a Luna/Ginny, though I now really want to since you've said that, but I am currently writing Fleur/Katie Bell and finding that really fun!
I really did want to take the almost 'political' aspect of this out, and just focus on their love rather than making some big statement about gayness :P I am sure they would face some adversity in the long run but like you say, this is a while in the future and things will have changed at least somewhat by then, and for this story at least it's not about the bad consequences of being a gay witch. It's a love story between two two people, and one of them is blind, and they're best friends, and it's just cute! I'm glad you liked that about it :D
I'm also happy you liked the little snippets of their past that I started off with. I have a habit of writing long, winding fics that take place over a series of relatively disconnected scenes, and it doesn't always work well for short oneshots like this, so I was trying to get out of that pattern - but I couldn't help giving just that little bit of backstory! I hate trying to cram backstory into the main body of a fic, though I know that's just a failing of my own writing ability, haha :P
Most of the reason I decided to make Lily blind in this is as a challenge to myself, because typically I use sight SO MUCH as a description in my writing. I really wanted to force myself into focusing on things like smell and touch and sound, because I think it's great writing practice to challenge yourself like that, so eliminating sight was super hard but I'm glad I did it. I'm really happy you thought I did a good job, too! I was nervous about all these weird new methods of description...
I was a little worried I hadn't developed Caitlin's character enough, so thank god you liked her! Haha, she is definitely very patient and lovely, which is really perfect for Lily. I think they are some of the most real characters I've ever written, to be honest - they don't have any extreme quirks or anything, but they still fit perfectly together, in a kind of subtle way. Thanks so much for saying you liked that :D
Thankfully I've now fixed the formatting :P It was driving me crazy the whole time the queue was closed!
Thank you so much for this awesome review!