Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:kenpo says:
Hey, here with your requested review.
I actually read this and wrote a review a few days ago, but for some reason didn't post it... sorry! I usually don't take this long.

Overall, I really enjoyed reading this. It was really nice to see a young Tonks. I think her characterisation was fantastic; I could absolutely see how the girl you portrayed would grow up into the Tonks we know and love.

The interactions between her and her parents was adorable. I really liked when Andromeda threw the flour and Nymphadora. It was a nice touch and gave a feeling of playfulness.

The premise of the story was such a great idea! Most people probably would've gone with Remus/Tonks if given that prompt, it's awesome that you took it in a different direction.

I enjoyed reading Ted and Andromeda. They play off each other well.

Ted seems like such a good father!

The transition into the Andromeda being sad was a little confusing, but once I got there it was written really well. It makes sense that she'd miss her sisters around holidays, but at the same time wouldn't want to share too much about them with her daughter.

There are only a few things I'd like to point out...

"Nymphadora moved to look at the cookies, and after looking at each of them, she made her selection."

You use a form of "look" twice. It read as slightly repetitive.

"Mummy?" Andromeda turned around immediately, "Merry Christmas." She smiled up at her mum and...

This was just slightly confusing, because "Andromeda" is the first word after the dialogue, but she isn't the speaker. Then at "She smiled" it is unclear who "she" is until you get to "her mum".

Other than those two things, I didn't really see anything worth mentioning.

You asked about the characters, and I really enjoyed the characters. If I had to say something, I'd say that sometimes Nymphadora seemed younger than ten.

Overall, really enjoyable little story. Sorry I took so long with the review!!

Author's Response: Hi!

That's alright. Sorry that I took so long to respond, to be honest- I've just been a bit lazy lately.

I definitely thought that having child Tonks and her family would be a little bit different than the usual Remus/Tonks (not that I don't adore them). I'm glad that you liked how Tonks and her parents were characterised- I was so worried that they'd be too out of character!

I wanted the bit with Andromeda to be a little confusing, because I wanted the reader to be in Tonks' position. Does that make sense? The same with Nymphadora- I wanted to show how, really, she is still just a little kid.

Thank you so much for the wonderful review!

x Ely

Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 688
Submit Report: