Whoa. Wow. Ah. Er - this was perfect. I just can't even... Explain... My feelings (?) about this.
I tend to write stories like this too, and in my reviews people tell me that it was so hard to read, and guy wrenching etc. etc. But I've never understood it, until now. So many emotions, and such sadness. I feel like crying because it was so sad.
This story... Is ah. I really not ought to be reading stories like these, because it is in a way a shocking reminder of some problems I've been through. I've thought about writing topics like this, and I have written suicide but particularly never this topic. For me it was either suicide or body image problems that were easy to write. This topic, though, needs to be cared for so tenderly, becauae it's all about pain... And it continues, unlike death where it ends. Gah, I don't make any sense. Let me not ramble.
The point about his name Freddie was beautiful. I admire the way you think because it is so clever. I would have never thought of it that way. You wrote this so beautifully. I think I might have to favourite it.
I admire how you've been working so long on this and am so happy that you posted. It's very rare when a piece manages to leave a mark, and this has. It was mind blowing and life changing. My words for you are not enough praise. I just want you to know that this piece is brilliant, and that you truly are so, so, so talented. And I could not stress that enough.
Author's Response: Hello hello! A thousand profuse apologies for leaving this lovely review for so long - it's been, what, a year and three months since you left this? I am actual human garbage, sorry.
Ahh, I'm sorry I made you feel like crying! I suppose it was the intention of the fic to be sad, but, I mean...wow, I'm a bit floored by the reaction I got to it.
It's funny, I really ought not to be reading or writing stories like this too, because, as I think I mentioned in the a/n, these are issues that I've dealt with very personally. Similarly, I've found suicide and body image, although sensitive and difficult in themselves to write about, easier to cope with in fiction. Death, as you say, is very definite, but pain like the sort I tried to write about here does go on and on and on and that can be more difficult to conceptualise in a piece of writing, I think. It's so endless and miserable and, yeah. Disturbing, too, I will admit. I've found a lot of writing - both on the internet and off - that almost romanticises this sort of behaviour and I suppose this fic was an unconscious attempt on my part to address that. I'm not sure how successful I was because I made this so bloody poetic but, well, I tried !
Thank you so, so much for this review. Again, I'm overwhelmed by the reaction to it. Your review is ever so nice and thoughtful. I hope you're well, and I'll be sure to check out your fics once I've got to the bottom of this pile of reviews.
Thank you!! ♥