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Review:BookDinosaur says:
Hello! I'm here for the first of the Twelve Days of Reviewing at HPFF - a chapter that features a feast. :)

I really liked this chapter. I think that your portrayal of the Middle Ages was very realistic, especially the speech. Previously when I've tried to write a piece that involved Sir Cadogan I found the speech very hard to get right without seeming stilted, but here it all seemed very natural and flowing, so well done there. It was easy t read and at the same time it felt very much like the Middle Ages.

I loved how Venn's mother was trying her best to get him married off and how she was appealing to him, to Slytherin, to anyone. The whole atmosphere of this chapter was very Old English, not just the speech. The way Venn and his mother treated each other and those less off then they were was very realistic. And I just have to mention how Venn's 'baser instincts' caused him to pause and say that well, Helena was worth at least a look. It was very believable and made him more relatale somehow, like he has faults too.

Since the reviewing task was to review a chapter with a feast I feel like I should at least comment on the feast in this chapter. Well, it was toned down and very dignified. If anything, i think I would have liked to see more mentions of the other guests in the room apart from the three main characters, Venn, his mother and Slytherin. other than that, this was very well written and perfectly paced.

Great story! :D

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for coming by! Sorry for the slight delay in my response :)

It did take some thought before I was happy with the dialogue, but I'm glad the style worked well and felt appropriate to the era. I agree; it can be hard to work it out!

Poor Edeline just wants to retire and get some grandkids, haha. Venn definitely has some faults--as does everyone in the story--and for now, all he sees with Helena is a chance to spend some time with a pretty face and get his mother off his back. Little does he know how much he'll grow to love Helena, and how she'll grow to love him.

Thanks for your comments about the feast. I don't remember if I mentioned other guests in the chapter, but I meant for it to just be the family. I'll have to have a second look at that. The family is definitely the focus, though there are servants present.

Thanks for your lovely review! I hope you return sometime and read more of the story!

-Amanda


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