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Review:CambAngst says:
Hi, Joop! I'm on your last chapter, so you know what you need to do. ;)

Everything is always at least a little bit sad where Fred is concerned. I accepted that a long time ago. It's just part of the experience. In this chapter, however, you balanced the sadness really well with lovely moments of excitement and optimism and happiness. That's always a great thing to have.

I liked the way that you drew out some differences between Fred and George. It's annoyingly cliche when authors act as though there were no differences whatsoever between the two of them aside from their names. The twins were two individuals who happened to share an incredible life bond.

I liked the mention of how Ginny's own children have been corrupted in a way by the products from WWW. As this story has gone along, it feels like you've gradually aged Ginny in a way. You focused so much on the time when she was a little girl in Bill and Charlie's sections, then gradually brought her along toward adulthood as you get to her younger siblings. By bringing James, Albus and Lily into the narrative, it gives us even more of a sense that we're getting Ginny's adult perspective on events that took place many years previous.

You captured a lot of raw energy in the scene where Fred shares his dreams for the joke shop with Ginny by the Black Lake. His enthusiasm sort of radiates off of the page. It was a really striking contrast to...

Whimper. The really horrible scene in the Great Hall. As sad as this part is, I loved what you did with it. The idea that Ginny was thankful that she never had to look into Fred's lifeless eyes, yet those eyes haunt her in her dreams. That was really deep and meaningful to me. Your ending to this chapter was absolutely beautiful. It's the sort of sentiment that I think Fred would have appreciated, even as he made fun of you for being such a sap.

Excellent writing! I couldn't find a single typo or grammatical problem. Can't wait to find out about George, Ron and possibly Harry and Hermione. :)

Author's Response: I'm actually halfway through the next chapter while responding to this review. I know. And, to be honest, I think reading this review was the kickstart for me to get writing again. So you have yourself to thank for that.

Onto your review: I never liked that George didn't have much of a personality in the books. It was always FredandGeorge. More like FREDandGeorge. He was always an afterthought. I never liked that.

You bring up how Ginny is more adult in this. To be honest, this story isn't really linear or chronological. I'm not even sure how old Ginny is in this. It's strange. I know her voice so clearly in my mind. But I don't really know what point she is writing/thinking all of this.

Hey, there's a sap in all of us!

You will get to see the rest of the boys. And maybe some men outside the Wesley family, as well.

Thanks again so much for all your support!

Joop.


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