Hi, I'm here from review tag! I think you've got a great start here, and I hope to read on soon :)
I'm already loving your idea to have Ellie be a medium of sorts (is that the right term?) I can see her encounters with dead people as great ways to give her some depth beyond the typical OC, and also to help her grow as a character throughout the story. I'll be excited to see what you do with it! I loved the scene with her great-grandmother, and I'll definitely look forward to more of that.
I think the strongest parts of the chapter are the scenes with Ellie and her family. Ellie's voice seems much softer in those parts, but still doesn't lose her great sense of humor. Constant sarcasm isn't my preference for an MC's voice, so I loved seeing Ellie show a more serious side. You also do a great job of showing us what each member of her family is like and how important their bond is to Ellie. I especially love her dad! It might be weird to say that he's my favorite character so far, but he is. I think it's because you did such a great job of showing us his distinctive characteristics (the scattered brain and cute sense of humor), and that made him stand out.
As the chapter goes on, it starts to get more into typical nextgen territory. That's not usually my cup of tea, but that said, I think you're doing a good job of catering to your target audience. I do hope to see more to Albus than the annoying shirtless neighbor who teases Ellie all the time. But you've got time for that development in later chapters, and I'll be curious to see what you do with him as a character :)
Really good start! I don't usually read nextgen (which you probably gathered), but I'm so glad I gave this one a shot. I'm super intrigued, and I hope to make some time to read on! Thanks for sharing this with us :)
Author's Response: Oh, wow! Thank you so much for reading this, even though next gen isn't really your thing!
Yeah, I think medium is the right word! I hope that her "ability" makes her more than your average OC, rather than a Mary Sue, which can happen. I have to be very careful about the way that I write her in that respect.
Yes! You picked up on that! The first version that I had up here was her being sarcastic all the time, with little of that inner monologue which told you why she was acting the way she was. As the story progresses I want it to become more and more obvious that her sarcasm is part personality, part defence mechanism. With her father and brother, she feels comfortable enough to let her guard down and just be as sarcastic as her personality dictates, rather than to protect herself from some perceived threat.
Awks, but there's a shirtless scene in chapter three. I treat it with as much realism as my writing skills allow, but yes. As a next gen story, there are some tropes that I include, partly because I do enjoy reading them myself.
Thanks so much for this review! Even though you don't really enjoy next gen, I hope to hear from you again sometime, ESPECIALLY if you don't enjoy the rest of the story! I'd still like to hear your thoughts on it!