The summary made me what to inquire further and here I am. I'm sort of excited about this, it has a good feel to it! And I like your writing style and flow. I love Lily II, she's one of my favourite next gen characters and there are certainly not enough stories about her so yay!! I love the it about potions because face it Harry wasn't all that good until he had help of the Half-Blood Prince, aka Snape. It's the little touches like that I love in next gen stories because it links back to the original adventures. Again if I'm not mistaken wasn't Healer Smethwyck at St. Mungo's when Arthur was in, in Order? Me like :)
I really like this and your description of St. Mungo's and that Lily is a healer mainly because that's sort of what Flick want's to do in UP and plus I think being a healer would be a really cool job. Imagine all of the different things you would see.
James is brilliant, I love him already and the part about him saying Lily is his favourite sister and she reminds him she's his only sister I thought was super great because my one brother does it to me all the time and it just made me smile. Him trying to ride a dragon is priceless, me thinks he needs some lesson off his Uncle Charlie.
I think you missed out the gap between the paragraphs where Lily is on about the different floors and when she takes her coat off. And the second I'm guessing you might be American, although I could be wrong (So correct me if I am) but you said 'vacation' when Lily is on about it being quiet and at the end when she's on about Austin staying over, but in the UK it's generally called a 'holiday' rather than a vacation.
When James says, "Cmon, Lil! Dad did it with Uncle Ron and Aunt Hermione!" you need an apostrophe in c'mon. And when Lily said to James, "And we can finish the rest of the reparation work." It sounded a little odd, maybe try 'repair work' instead. Add a space between 'past times' as well.
I'm certainly adding this to my favourties, I can't wait to find out more about Lily's old crush!! There really aren't enough stories about her life after Hogwarts on here!!
I'm intrigued about Austin and I like that it's an OC rather than one of the Scamander twins or even Scorpius. I'm looking forward to seeing/finding more about his back story and how Lily came to like him and how she's going to be more than his 'best friends little sister'. A really good start.
P.s Chapter 37 of UP is in the queue, and should be up soon :)
Author's Response: Hi!!
Yay I love your reviews!
Yes you are correct about Healer Smethwyck. I didn't want to create a new healer, and I felt like using him would really tie a connection in for those who remembered. Plus it's always fun to have that one old person who won't quit.
I was actually thinking of Harry's lack of potions skills when I decided she not be good at potions. I definitely wanted to make Lily an overachiever, especially since she's trying to prove herself in a way that no one in her family has.
I adore Lily II as well! I must admit, I would never pair her with Scorpius. I love scorose WAY WAY WAY too much to do that. I was actually afraid to write a story about her, because she's so different for me, so your review is encouraging!
Ah, you caught me! I am indeed an American. Changing the terms is the thing that makes it hardest for me. I have loads of friends in the UK, but it's not the same, there's only so much you can pick up. I mean, I've adopted saying twat, bloke, wanker, shag, brilliant and bloody because of them, but that's because they say them all the time.
Thanks for the corrections, I'm going to do a clean sweep and clean up all of my chapters in all of my stories in a few chapters' time, I think, that way they're all good and new, so I'll definitely fix those and try to erase my Americanisms.
I'm so happy you like it enough to add it to Favs!! I feel like there aren't enough stories about ANYONES lives after Hogwarts on here. I want to do one on Rose and Scorp, but I'm pacing myself. I don't want to jump too far ahead here.
As for Austin, I'm so excited to start writing him more, he's going to be really fun to write in. He's great friends with James, and they're similar in some aspects. This story is definitely going to be fun with the two of them. And as for the dragon thing, I mean, I just couldn't resist. I thought it was the perfect way to bring him back into her life. And him kissing her was, I think, the perfect way for him to stir the pot, so to say.
Thanks so much!!
P.S. I just squee'd when I read that!! Can't wait to give it a read!!!