Hello! I am here with the review you requested, on the third chapter, as you asked. To tell the absolute truth: I actually read this story about a day before you requested a review from me, and so it was absolutely no problem to start reviewing on chapter three! :D
So far, I really like the way you've got the story set up, with flashbacks and scenes from the present day. It makes things very interesting, and I really can't wait to read more.
Josephine is a really cool and different OC. It seems to me that OCs come in very cookie cutter shapes these days, and Jo breaks the mold, yay!! I like that she is quiet and shy, and that she's fallen for one of the loudest people ever. It is also awesome that she can tell Fred and George apart (although it's also a bit stalker-ish!) :) My question is, why did she fall for George instead of Fred? From what I've read, she was never really in contact with the Weasley twins at Hogwarts, so how has she come to know how they differ? Are we going to get to see a flashback to explain that in the future? :D I certainly hope so, because I'm really curious!
Fred and George are hilarious. I love Fred's over-the-top, slapstick humor, and George's interruption was quite amusing. I certainly hope that Jo will learn to keep her head when he enters a room, because they're going to be working together, and it'll get awkward if she hides every time she sees him. ;)
The only piece of advice that I have for you is simply this: When something is plural, it does not get an apostrophe. The only word that I noticed was when Fred said "I love nutter's!" In this case, "nutters" is plural, not possessive, so it does not need an apostrophe. That was the only thing I saw that could've been better, though. I'm afraid that if you wanted some major CC, I didn't give it to you--I was too busy complimenting! :)
Overall, this story is fabulously well-written, with really great characterization, and an interesting premise. I hope that you update very soon! :D
Author's Response: LOL That's so funny! What good timing! haha I'm glad it wasn't inconvenient requesting for this chapter specifically! ^.^
Yay! I'm so happy to hear that you're enjoying the format! I really wanted to have the story set up in a way that the readers slowly learn about different aspects of Jo's life rather than simply being told about her past, so I'm glad it's working! And double yay for wanting to read more! *squee*
Eep! I'm so happy you like Jo! She's definitely not a cookie cutter OC - she is WAY too flawed for that! hahaha Poor thing. :-p I really enjoy her opposites-attract thing with George and I'm glad it's working! Ah, a very good question to ask, and one that will be answered in either chapter 5 or 6! It's great that you're so intrigued!!!
Omg, I'm SO beyond thrilled that you're enjoying the twins! It's so important to me that I write canon character's correctly! And this was my first really comedic moment that I've written, so it's so good that it landed! And all of the Jo/George growth shall be revealed in time as well. ;) hehehe
Ah, thank you for pointing that out! That's actually one of the few grammatical things that I get confused on! That and 'affect' versus 'effect' - gets me every time. :-p I'll edit that out sometime soon! And pffft! If that's the only CC you've got for me, I am SO happy! I always get really nervous posting new chapters, so you've given me a great relief with this wonderful review!
This is such a lovely review! Thank you so much for it and I'm just thrilled that you're enjoying it so far! Chapter four should hopefully be out during the first week of December! Yay! *hugs*