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Review:marauderfan says:
Hi there! I'm here with your much delayed requested review!

I liked the way you started out - it was raw and powerful and definitely drew me into the story! And the following scene was really nice, I like the way you wrote the friendship between the Marauders as they're all there for James to help him out. I like your characterisation for all of them, it seems solid.

In terms of plot believability/holes... maybe this was just me but I wasn't quite sure what had happened and what Malfoy's intention was. I think it'd be helpful to have a little explanation of what Malfoy did or what happened to James. It went straight from James and co. guessing about what it could be, to Remus knowing what had happened and I couldn't help but feel like something was missing. Also, why couldn't he help James when he found out what was going on? I think just a few more details in that section would be really helpful.

The ending was really ominous and vague at the same time, which was neat. I liked that you ended form Lucius's POV, although I still wasn't quite sure why he needed their future son for anything. It makes him sound like a Seer - is that intentional? (actually now I notice that one of the genres is labelled as "mystery" - so maybe I shouldn't be asking, lol!)

That aside, though, I think this is a great piece. I hope I haven't been too critical, because I did like it! You've packed a lot of emotion into it and kept the tone mysterious and dark, with some cute stuff thrown in there at the end when they make up. Great work on this, I enjoyed reading it!! :)

Author's Response: Don't worry about your "lateness", real life has to happen sometime! :)

I just realized that I had completely forgotten the in between scene, as I had written it somewhere else so that will be in once it's been updated! I was also made aware of the 5-year difference between Malfoy and the Marauders, so his character will most likely be changed.

This was my first try at writing the Marauders, so I'm very ecstatic you think I characterized them well! :D This was obviously for a challenge but I absolutely love writing dark/mysterious stuff (if you couldn't tell from my novel) so this was a blast!

Thank you very very much for this review, I will definitely be back for more! :)
~MadiMalfoy x


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