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Review:DumbledoresArmyOfOne says:
Hi Lo!
I'm so sorry for the terrible, terribly delay. You of all people know how NaNo is... it sucks your soul, I tell you.

Okay, so I'll start with what I enjoyed, which pretty much encompasses the whole chapter! This is a really interesting premise and I'm excited to read more. Teenaged royalty, a shocking letter, boring paperwork and... peacocks? What's not to love! It was really well written, and, thought short, engaging and interesting.

As for believability, it was really good! I have a few concerns about characterization. I understand that Carolyn is young and she has to be relatable, but I'd imagine that if she was brought up in Court, some 'royalness' would rub off on her. She seems almost a bit /too/ relatable, if you know what I mean. But as a character I like her a lot, and she is, of course, /yours/ :P

I only noticed a couple of punctuation errors, and no spelling mistakes (except one You're where it should be your) so that's always lovely!

I really liked the ending! Such intrigue o.O

So great start, I can't wait to see what happens next :D

(you can't be mad at me for not writing today because I wrote a review for YOU ! :D )

~Gilly

Author's Response: Hi Gilly!
And I totally know how much time NaNo suck out of your life, so don't worry :P

Yay! I'm glad you liked it! And as for Carolyn's royalness, I should really look into projecting what I'm thinking. I might as well explain it here though :)

Basically her mother tried to let her have a moderately average life, but when her mother died she was pushed into the role of queen and basically rebelled against that for a while. I will look into making her a little bit more formal, but I tried to convey a teenager sick of her job and just wanting to take a break since all she does is paperwork...

And I will definitely check for those errors and that horrifying typo! Gosh! I'm so embarrassed...

And yay! I'm glad you liked it! And no worries about not writing today, as long as you stay caught up. (To be honest, I only wrote about 2000 words last Monday to Friday. Weekends are my NaNo saver!)

Thanks!
Lo :)


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