Hi!! I'm checking out this story for the RRT. I didn't want to read the next chapter of The Marauder Years until 9 is up. I hate waiting so I always put off reading the last chapter of a WIP.
To sum it up, I love, love, LOVE this chapter. Your Lily has weaknesses (one of them being Transfiguration). I've seen her portrayed as a Hermione in a lot of stories which didn't seem quite realistic. You showed that she is hard working though - which I could really see. And, I hope this doesn't come off wrong, but she's almost as arrogant as James. Her arrogance is quite different but she has this whole superiority thing (judging who is and isn't good for her friends, being above an end of term party, etc.) I really like that she's not Ms. Perfect. :D
I like that you had different folks as her friends in this story. So, it would have been easy (read lazy) to carry over people you created for the Marauder Years to this story but you made new and quite distinct people. They were quite fresh from a narrative POV. I have such a hard time re-imaging people or situations I've written before. You really convey that these girls have been friends for quite a few years too.
I'm on the fence about Sirius asking Lucinda out. Does he really like her or is he planning something mean?!?! I hope he really likes her because I couldn't stand him being a poo-face.
I really like the idea of James helping Lily with transfiguration. It really opens the door for new possibilities (if you catch my drift). I imagine that James would have a different way of explaining things thatn McGonagall. I quite like the idea that James appeared less interested in Lily this year (at least he wasn't obnoxiouslly obsessed). I'm sure that will have put Lily off her gaurd around him a bit.
I'm so excited to read more of this!!
Author's Response: Rose!!! You don't know how happy I am to see you've come to check out this story :D And you've successfully motivated *guilt-ed* me into writing - I'll try to get the next chapter up very soon!
It has made me even happier that not only have you checked this story out but that you loved this opening chapter!!! I really value your opinions so that put a ridiculously large grin on my face :D
I am so glad you liked my Lily! In the books Lily was always portrayed as such a lovely person who everyone loved - which I'm sure she was, but this does not mean she was perfect and I find it very unrealistic that she excelled at everything and was a perfect person. No-one is perfect and it irks me a bit when she is portrayed this way in fan-fic! I do think she was a very talented witch, and that she did do well at school, but at the same time I think she would have had to really work at it (or at least for some subjects), no-one can be great at everything (well, maybe with the exception of Hermione ;)) Sorry, ranted a bit there. I'm really glad you like that she's not Ms. Perfect. She is a bit arrogant in this fic, but she would deny that profusely if you said it to her face - so please don't she has a rather fiery temper and I couldn't be held responsible for her actions in her stressed state ;)
I did consider using the same characters from Marauder Years but they did not fit into this story line, and as I'm eventually going to be covering their 6th year in that fic it felt wrong to use them here as their story will be quite different. Plus, I really enjoyed these new characters, especially Lucinda and the friendship her and Lily have :)
Ooh, I can't say much here about Sirius... I will assure you that he isn't a poo-face though! I could never write Sirius as a poo-face, I love him too much ;) (I just have to tell you I laughed SO hard at reading that >.< my inner child was delighted with your choice of words there :D heehee) But, yeah, all is not as it seems there...
I am so glad you like the idea of James helping Lily with Transfiguration - I am going to have a lot of fun with their tutoring sessions!! I hope you'll enjoy reading them. Mmmm, yes he does have a different way of explaining things and I think he could really help Lily ;) I have always imagined that, while James was still totally obsessed with Lily, he would have hidden it better for a while before he won her round... treat them mean, keep them keen ;) I'm glad you liked that idea.
I am super happy that you are excited to read more of this story!! I hope it doesn't disappoint!
So, I love, love, LOVE this review :D Sorry it took a while to respond but I wanted to keep it there, waiting in my unanswered review box so I could keep reading it again and again! Thank you so much for this review, you really do know how to make my day :D