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Review:marauderfan says:
Hello again, here with your requested review!

Goodness, Grace got herself into quite the situation in this chapter. I think her impulsivity came out at its strongest here with the closet scene. Poor REgulus :p

Speaking of Regulus, I really like the way you wrote Snape and Regulus's "friendship". Obviously they're not exactly friends - I don't think they ever could be, with one of Snape's worst enemies being Regulus' brother -but they are both Slytherins and at least get on with one another. To be honest I can't imagine Snape being friends with anyone. Anyway, I think it seemed realistic.

Remus has fallen for Grace pretty quickly! Or at least feels some sort of connection. Poor guy. I bet Grace doesn't even realize she's toying with his feelings.

My CC this time is kind of subjective - this may be just me, but I thought Grace swore a kind of ridiculous amount in this chapter. I mean, I know teenagers swear a lot, and she in particular is one whose mouth is faster than her brain, so a lot of swearing seems to fit her character. But in the beginning of this chapter, it felt like every other word from her mouth was a strong curse word, and it was a bit off-putting. And I think in a real school, she wouldn't be able to get away with yelling some of those things in the corridor because if a professor heard her, she'd probably get detention for a week. (But again, I realise this is really subjective and everyone will have their own opinion on that.) I guess what I'm saying is... maybe consider just a little less?

Anyway, looking forward to James and Grace's talk! And the aftermath of locking Regulus in a closet hehehe. Great work on this chapter :D

Author's Response: Hello!

I'm still introducing characters...and for some reason thought that Regulus' introduction needed a humorous aspect. So I made Grace lock him in the closet. :D

Ah yes...the wolf complex. There will be a bit of a change after the full moon, but right now...poor Remus :(. And no, Grace doesn't :(.

Ah yes! I have realized that Grace swears entirely too much and I plan on cutting it back. Actually in this particular chapter I had to go back through and add in more foul language to keep true to her characterization. But I think that you are right, she does swear too much! I will fix that :).

Yay! Grace and James finally talk! :)

Thanks again!


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