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Review:patronus_charm says:
I liked this chapter as it helped make a little more sense of Helen as a character. She seems to want to disociate herself with the image of an English lady as much as possible with her comments about living beside the river and previous ones she's made. It's an excellent layer to her already comple character because that suggested proposal couldn't have caused her to become so extreme in that sense so I wonder what did make her like that.

Again, Emile is confusing me too. I know despite his rather obvious affections for Helen she likes him but I just can't warm to him. The whole hiring her for a tour guide seems a little odd. So I'll wait and see what will happen with him. Again, he's another wonderful character of yours.

Your descriptions in this chapter were so vivid with horses clomping along, the cries of people and the interfering British soldiers, that I am almost felt that I was part of the tour of Egypt too. One thing that really makes it work is the blend of historical detail in terms of the description as it just lifts it to another level.

Moody was great! He and Helen are a natural double act with their inquisitive minds. I like how you're slowly altering Helen's feelings for them because they were abusive they were not so abrasive. I really can't wait to see the future for these two!

The drama in this chapter was great! I can't wait to find out what the cause of death for the Muggle was and what it means in the grand scheme of things. Then the rock nearly hitting Helen with the fingerprints (claw prints?) on it was another curiosity. I really can't wait to read on and find out what will happen next!

-Kiana

Author's Response: This is the part where, as a writer, I run into trouble because I've had Helen in my head for many years, and I've created a whole backstory for her, but there's only so much of it that can actually appear in this story. I can tell you that she's spent much of her life isolated, not only because she was physically isolated on her family's estate, but also because she never really had any friends, not even at Hogwarts. She sees herself as different from her peers, from other Englishwomen and from other witches, and one thing she has to learn in this story is how to work with others. She's a loner, very independent and proud. What she tends not to see is that she's often the very type of person that she criticizes - the haughty lady, looking down her nose at others. She needs to work on her self-evaluation skills. :P

I'm glad to hear that you can't warm to Emile. He's so bloody creepy! And that's exactly how I want him to be - somewhat off in his behaviour, not quite trustworthy, not evasive so much as odd.

It's also lovely that you've enjoyed the descriptions. I think it's very important to make the world around the characters come to life to remind readers that there's so much more going on in the background. And it's been interesting to do this through Helen's eyes - I don't usually include so many descriptions in a first person narrative, but because Helen is writing about these events later in her life, we also get a lot of her nostalgia for the place. (She's actually writing the narrative twenty years later in England, which is why she focuses so much on the details.)

In this chapter, you can really see how Helen's opinion of Moody is changing. I love hearing that you enjoy their scenes together. ^_^

Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! I can't express how much it means to have your feedback!


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