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Review:TheSortingHat says:
Oh my gosh. Oh. My. Gosh.
Yes. Yes. Yes.

I have to preface this by saying that I have a soft spot in my heart for the stories that don't end quite so conventionally well (I myself am currently writing a Dramione that takes place the summer after sixth year, but follows canon, so they won't end up together). Tragedies are just so beautiful in their way.

But this story. I truly thought that they were going to end happily ever after. Even up until that last sentence, I half-believed that Draco and Hermione would be rescued from the fire at the last moment, and that Draco's burst of magic would somehow have saved Hermione from dying--that perhaps she wasn't really dead at all. That they would have their "all's well that ends well" moment.

And yet... they didn't. The ending was truly and magnificently shocking, and I had to double-check that this story really was marked "Completed". So congratulations on coming out of nowhere and ending the story on such a poignant note. No, they didn't get their happily ever after. Yet who is to say that their ending was not happy enough after all--they will still be together, even in death.

It reminds me a bit of Romeo and Juliet--and the male's mother even died, and maybe we can count Goyle as Mercutio! :D

So all I really wanted to say was that it was a fantastic and completely unexpected conclusion that, oddly enough, kind of made me smile (Not the characters' fates, of course, but the structural and plot choices in and of themselves).

From a writing craft perspective, try to always have flawless conventions (for example, "parent's memories" in the paragraph about Hermione's parents' memory loss should be "parents' memories"), and keep striving to improve your sentence structures ("The tents were charmed with looking standard outside, and multiple rooms inside. Much like the ones her, Harry, and Ron had used during the war.", for example, could be along the lines of "The tents were charmed to appear to be standard-sized from the outside despite having several rooms inside, reminding Hermione of the tent that she, along with Harry and Ron, had used years before during the war." This flows better, has no sentence fragments, and is slightly less ambiguous.)

Keep writing and improving your craft, and keep spinning out such lovely plot twists! I look forward to seeing what you write in the future.


Author's Response: The Sorting Hat
'Romeo and Juliet is really the type of tragic romance I was basing this after. I felt after the lives they lived, they could never truly be 'happily ever after', and wanted a poetic ending for the two of them.
Thank you so much for the tips on the writing, unfortunately it took me a long time to get this chapter to my editor and she had just started school, etc so she had a lot of things on her plate outside of fixing my run on sentences!
I do plan on writing more, whether it's fan fiction or something original I haven't decided yet.
Thank you so much for the great review! I am so glad you enjoyed reading this story as much as I enjoyed writing it! I must admit, I'm a little sad myself that it is all over, this has been a great process for me. Thanks again!

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