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Review:APerkins says:
Hey I feel bad for swamping you with reviews but I just cant seem to help myself.
As you said, (or at least as I hope you still mean) there are worse problems than being smothered with reviews, right?

..yeah.. Well

Anyway, im actually going to offer some cc here.. aware again that this story is inactive and may not be relevant.
I think you have used the word ostensibly when you may have meant overtly.

If you had written "she stared at each one of the ostensibly to look into their souls but really just to frighten the life out of them", the sentence would have made sense, but from the context her actually motivation was to study each of them- which has no hidden meaning, and overtly is probably more appropriate.

I love the way your story has so many complex layers. It just keeps getting deepee and deeper.
In that last chapter, where it turns out there is a reason hermione has a mental block.
Here, where the ministry is weak and willing to give into pressure. I see that for of thing oversimplified to make it easy to understand but by keeping the complexity you make it real.
This is great. :);

Author's Response: First off, you should never, ever feel badly about leaving somebody a review. As a reader, it's far and away the kindest thing we can do, I think. If this is what being smothered is like, I don't wanna breathe! Also, I really appreciate constructive criticism, no matter how long a story has been posted. You can always make something better!

As far as the line you pointed out, the idea is that she's "ostensibly" making eye contact the wizards in the group while she's actually keeping an eye on the one that she suspects is an Auror. Reading that passage again, I definitely could have made that clearer.

I tried really hard to let my imagination run with the characters and give adequate time to all of the little subplots that popped up along the way. I definitely left a few dangling here and there. That's why chapter 40 ended up being 11,000 words long. I tried to tidy up some of the most interesting ones.

Thanks for reading and reviewing!


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