Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:Cannons says:
Hi again, here with your requested review!

YAY! First review! ( I hope, wouldn't it be embarrassing if I wasn't and someone had just got in before me!)

Anyway, I thought this was a really special start to this story. It was just the right length for a prologue, enough to build up the suspense you were going for and at the same time not giving too much away, whilst reeling in the interest of the reader. So great job.

I have to say that your description throughout was amazing, so detailed and I think this was a great help in building up the suspense. It reminded me a bit of 'Lee Child's' style. (I hope you've heard of him)

One of my favourite lines was 'They formed trails in the snow and branched out like distributaries of a river' That was such a powerful image, another one 'Snow, like a deceptive veil, hid all the graying stones with teary epitaphs; it masked death in its beauty and obscured the vision of decaying bones beneath the earth.'

I'll stop there because I would just quote the whole thing other wise, but yeah your detail defiantly sets the scene.

For some reason before you said that it was Teddy, I was like 'no don't open the window, it's Tom Riddle!' stupid me! and another great image here 'His eyes were painted in the shade of dawn's golden light ' but yeah I'll stop quoting now, otherwise I'll have the whole thing here.

I am horrible with grammar but I think I noticed a grammar thing but you had a beta so ignore me if this is wrong -

'she was in no position recount the story with precision' - I think there should be a 'to' in there, or the sentence needs to changed maybe I don't know..

LOL, at my attempt with grammar, anyways I really enjoyed reading this, the detail was amazing. You really left me with so many questions like 'Do the muggles have anymore to do with it' and ' what does she mean when she says ''Something always happens on this road, because Harry Potter lives down this road' and who killed the muggles and why and more.. so I hope you continue with this ( I don't know if you are because you mentioned a challenge ) but I hope you do.

Great work!

Cannons

Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 955
Submit Report: