Hi Nicole! I am here for review tag.
This was amazing. Seriously, I've rarely come across writing as beautiful as this piece of work. Your imagery and description is astounding and I love it. I can visualise every little detail in my head =)
I enjoyed your characterisation of Andromeda, it seemed like how I'd imagine her to be in her old age. I am very curious about this Apple island and the kelpie too. The plot, I must say, is very intriguing and creative and I am itching to find out more.
I think this is a brilliant start to your short story, and I am excited to read the next chapter. What makes it even more interesting is that it is in reverse chronological order!
I love the concept of the apples having 'stars' by the way, and I also liked your explanation of Teddy/Vic leaving for a hike and not coming back, and Andromeda staying in the Lovegood house. It all sounds so natural and plausible.
The emotions in the narrative came through wonderfully as well. I could feel Andromeda's monotony and sadness, and I could sympathise with her. I also liked how you incorporated little "Black family" details into her personality, that was good.
All in all, this was a superb chapter, especially the descriptions, and I am glad I came across it. I am favouriting it as I really like it and would love to keep track of this story.
Great job as always,
P.S. I would love to know what inspired you for this unique plot!
Author's Response: AD!! ♥ What an absolutely lovely review! Thank you for this; your compliments just make me keyboard smash asdlljkhfcnue,mas,m *hugs*
I'm so glad you enjoyed my new short story - imagery, detail, characterisation and all. I was actually writing this for a challenge (First Chapter Challenge - though as usual, I didn't make the deadline...), and I was originally going to write a Remus/Tonks, possibly in reverse chronology, going back from the Battle of Hogwarts to their happier days but didn't really have much inspiration. Somehow I ended up including Andromeda in the fic, and she'll probably be the main character there, though Remus and Tonks will still feature. I also happened to stumble on the Wikipedia page for 'Avalon', which apparently translates to 'Isle of Apples', which was such a pretty name. And I decided to fit that into my story. And er, not sure how Aequin the kelpie came in, but he did.
Apples having stars in their centres are more facts than anything :) All you have to do is cut the apple into half along its equator and the pips will form a star. I think I included some info on this in my write-up for The Chaser haha...
I'm glad you found the emotions convincing; you've pretty much got them all, everything I wanted to convey about Andromeda's situation: her monotony and dissatisfaction and tiredness.
Thank you so much for your wonderful review, AD! And for favouriting. This really, really means a lot to me. I won't be updating this for a few weeks because unfortunately I've signed up for too many challenges and I'm trying to get those done first before I come back to this story.
Thank you! ♥ ♥