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Review:forsakenphoenix says:
Amanda! I've been missing Harry Potter fanfiction lately and I decided to take a break from studying boards to see if you had anything new. I was pleasantly surprised to find this one-shot! I always enjoy reading your fics, mostly because I know I'm in for a treat when it comes to character studies - and I love how you portray Lily here.

I don't know if I would necessarily call this story morbid. Honest, yes. People forget how young Lily and James were when they married and had Harry (after all, they were only 21 when they died). I guess sometimes thinking of their ages objectively like that is often difficult when you have to come to terms with what they had to face with the war.

But you make Lily think about the consequences of bringing a child into the world in the midst of a war - she seems like the character that would think about all these things, weigh the pros and cons. All the while you remind us of her Muggle past. I really loved that detail - that she used magic first to tell her she was pregnant but fell back on familiarity with Muggle medicine. I think it says a lot about her and her desire to hold onto things that remind her of her past.

I think my favorite line was the bit about "selfish little hope". This is Lily's chance to take control of her life, to not let anyone tell her what to do, or how to raise her child. This child is a new start for her, perhaps a way to relive those special moments between mother and child, but now being on the other side of it.

I wish I had more to say, or some sort of constructive criticism, but we all know that I'm rubbish at that anyway. This was lovely and so well-written, which is not a surprise at all. I'm glad to see you continue to write and explore different characters and scenarios. It's wonderful. :)

Author's Response: Missy! Please excuse the fact that this response is woefully overdue. I miss you and hope you'll be back to HPFF very soon!

Lily is so fun to investigate. I was just enamored with her all summer. While I got married only slightly later than Lily, I can't even imagine having a child at that age. I just feel for her because she must have felt so alone, having to learn to be a wife and mother with only so much help from her non-wizarding family and limited contact with the outside world. No wonder she grew up so fast and quickly became the woman capable of facing down Voldemort in exchange for her child's life--it's even more startling to think about when I consider the contrast with the Lily I present here.

I didn't want to make Lily into another Hermione, worrying about the tiniest details of her pregnancy and poring over thousands of baby books, but I did feel like she would be pretty practical and might even use details to fall into an escape from her real world troubles and intense emotions. I pictured her conducting a home pregnancy test and basically living with constant anxiety until she got the confirmation from the doctor--and she wasn't even sure how to feel about the situation until that moment. I think of Lily as a person whose decisions mean a lot to her, and she wouldn't arrive at them lightly.

Everyone loves that line, although it was honestly a last minute addition that just sort of popped into my head. Gotta love it when that happens. But yeah, I like to think of Lily's strength as being visible in this small moment, when she decides to take change and stop being a victim. I think it's when "Lily the woman" starts to emerge.

Thank you so much for your awesome review! I'm really glad you enjoyed the story :)

-Amanda


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