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Review:milominderbinder says:
Hi, Maia here from review tag!

So - eek, this was amazing! You definitely deserved the win in this challenge and congratulations on it. I honestly just loved your characterisation of Luna. She is one of the hardest characters to write and I don't read a lot of fic with her because of that - people often fall into the trap of trying to make her TOO wacky in a way that has no logic or reason behind it. But I thought you captured her perfectly here - she's quirky, and different, but there's elements of logic to her thoughts, and you really got inside her head in a way that was great to read. Your OC was also amazing. I have actually read a few of the other entries to this challenge and, while they were all great, I can see why yours stood out, because you really explored this whole other side of eccentricity and originality. Mortimer was SO neat and organised that he surpassed normality and veered into eccentricity without realising it, and that was awesome to read. My favourite few lines were by far:

As he walks out the door, the hem of his trouser leg is wrinkled and I notice that he is wearing bright yellow socks. That makes me smile. Then I turn back to the desk, where the Streeler is yellow as well.

Again, I thought this was an amazingly interesting thing to portray about Mortimer. It really brushed on the idea that everyone has things you wouldn't expect about them, everyone's a little strange beneath the surface. But I also like how you didn't leave it on a 'bombshell' line, like if you'd ended it after mentioning his socks. You linked it back into the story, and also showed Luna's small reaction to it, and also kind of softened it with the really casual last line so that it fit really well into the rest of the story. Okay, I'm not sure if I'm making sense anymore, I just really loved this!

Thanks for a wonderful read, and congrats on the challenge < 3

~Maia

Author's Response: Aaa! Thank you so much - I know it's going to be a good day when someone says my writing is amazing ;)

I'm glad you liked my characterisation of Luna! I agree she's really difficult to write, and especially doing this in first person I kind of wondered about it the whole time I was writing. And in trying to get inside her head I figured that in a way, she's not really that wacky, she just sees things differently. And of course she wouldn't see her own actions as weird, from her POV!

That's exactly what I was going for with Mortimer, I think you summed him up pretty well! I'm so glad you liked reading about him!

You did make sense, I get what you're saying. I'd never really thought about how the last lines fit to the rest of the story - I just wrote how I thought Luna might have ended a story she was telling. So I really appreciate what you said there - I'm glad that ending worked!

Thank you for such an amazing and thoughtful review!! ♥


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