Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:BLONDEbehaviour says:
Hi there! BLONDEbehaviour here with your requested review!

I really enjoyed reading this! This is the first fic i have read that is any earlier in time before the Maruders, and it was a neat one-shot! Well done!

I liked how you described her quite well, so we knew what she looked like and such, especially for the party. Perhaps a little more description of her bedroom would suffice for that description :)

I liked how you showed that the pureblood society isn't perfect and does have its flaws, even back in the 1940's, with the beatings of her second cousin.

But, in the pureblood society, it was rare that anyone did care- Loved this line!!

I couldn't see any grammar or spelling mistakes (yay!!) but there are a couple of suggestions that I have that could help improve it :)
Maybe giving us an age of Walburga, so we know when this is going on in her life, as I do not know at the year of 1941 what her age would be. If that would just be me, then don't worry!
Also, maybe a little extra info on her brother and Cygnus. How old are they both, and who's baby is Cygnus? Is that her mums baby? I'm just asking these because I'm not sure whether anyone would have researched as extensively as you did :) (kudos for doing that by the way!)

I hope this was help, and I wish you all the very best for your competition!

Please respond to this review, thanks :)

Grace

Author's Response: Grace!

Thanks for the lovely review. I'm glad you liked it. It's actually going to be a novel... haha. So some of those that you asked to are to come! Though, I should mention Walburga is sixteen. Cygnus is her mums, and her and Alphard's little brother. I assumed that people would know this, but then again, it is a generation that isn't much touched on.

Thanks for the lovely review. It means a lot!

-Janelle


Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 994
Submit Report: