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Review:MC_HK says:
Hiya! It feel good to be back again! :)

Although it was a bit short, I really liked this chapter. There were really fun interactions on both POVs, and I like the dynamics you've come up with for James's family. I do think dialogue is your strong point, as it's always very well done, and your imagery is also very good.

There are still a few things in here that I've mentioned before, though. You tend to repeat words a lot, or at least put them in places where it sounds very repetitive. In this chapter, the word "plate" seemed very repetitive to me, and you also end the chapter with the three dialogues beginning in "well". There are some spelling errors and punctuation errors, but those are minor. There's also a point where you say Sirius and James are snickering into their food, but James has no food on a count of his mother withholding it from him.

Overall, good, solid chapter. Look forward to the next update!


Author's Response: Hey, sorry this took me a bit to respond!

Wow, thanks. I've always struggled a bit with everything sounding natural, and I'm glad I'm improving on that.

I seem to have trouble with repetition, and I've been slacking off on watching out for it. Thanks for reminding me. Thanks for all your help!

And I have a feeling you'll like the next chapter for some reason. Thanks again

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