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Review:LilyEPotter says:
Hi! Here for the Gryffie Review Exchange!

I already felt so sorry for Myrtle in the books, but you have brought the dreariness and hopelessness of her shadow of life to the front.

Your descriptions of Myrtle's feelings are very good and allow the reader to see exactly how she's still able to feel a modicum of emotions even though she cannot experience them fully anymore.

One item I noticed was "passive. .Alone". There's an extra ".".

I thought that the story flow was good, leading her from thought to thought all the while she wishes to experience the fullness of the emotion being displayed at the time.

Great job!

Author's Response: Hi there :) I'm sorry I took a while with this.

I was hoping to accomplish how dull and bitter she felt about the whole thing. I'm glad that came through. Thank you so much :) As there was nearly zero dialogue, I wanted to make sure that the descriptions stood out!
Ah. I shall fix the typo. Thanks for pointing it out :) Thanks again! you've said many lovely things here :)


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