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Review:Calypso says:
Hello there! I'm finally here with your review from the Gatsby Quote challenge!

Ooh a Snape story! I know he gets a lot of criticism, but I think he's such a fascinating character so I look forward to seeing that explored over the course of a longer piece of writing. I can imagine that Harry might have quite conflicted feelings about him following that scene in DH and so it seems totally natural that he'd want to find out more about him...

Kudos to you for narrating from the POV of such an established character! I always find it such a challenge and you did it marvellously here. Your Harry did feel like the Harry we see in the books, with the kinds of thoughts he was having and everything...

The first scene was very atmospheric, and I loved the description of the Firewhiskey "both intriguing and repulsing him"... The bit about Albus and Rose made me smile- Rose sounds just like mini-Hermione! I liked how Albus' fears about ending up in Slytherin came directly before the story of the man who taught Harry that Slytherin isn't all bad; that was clever.

I absolutely loved your description of Harry's trek through Spinner's End! You captured it just perfectly and I could really picture it in my head, which I always like when I'm reading!
I did think that you could have spun that part out even more to build up the tension- instead of saying that Harry performed the security spells, you could show him doing them and how he feels as he does it... I don't know, it's just a thought.

Oh that photo was so sad! It was horrible to think of all the things that would happen to Snape and Lily one day when I read the description of the photo. I really liked the way you talked about Severus' smile- it seemed representative of a side of Snape that Harry never saw...
The message that Lily sent was really cute! I loved the voice you had for her- she sounds just like that in my head! haha Plus it was a rather poignant message for her to have written him...

One of the things you manage to highlight in this is just how little Harry knows about his own parents, especially his mother cos he doesn't have Sirius or someone to tell him about her... I can see exactly why he wanted to investigate the diary, but also why he had been holding off...

Ooh and I do like a good cliffhanger! Great first chapter- I look forward to reading on and finding out more...!

-Bethany

Author's Response: Bethany :) Hello. I'm so sorry that I'm so late, I would have responded earlier, but I've been quite busy.

I love Snape. I really honestly do. he's such a complex character. He's so flawed, but driven. And I love what the power of true love can make you strive to do. Snape is simply brilliant, and his love, so pure.

That is the greatest compliment you could have paid me, for this chapter. Writing Harry was by no means easy. I tried to make it realistic. thank you so much :)

Haha, thanks :) I think using Snape's story here played well with the quote I was given!
I love nextGen characters, and I was very excited to include that little bit about them too!

Well, thanks :) I tried to write that part out in a descriptive manner. I'm glad you liked it. I will consider drawing it out, and adding more detail when I edit this! thanks :)

It is horrible, after you write about them in their early years, and you're suddenly reminded of what is left for them. it's really so sad. This whole short story is centered around a side of Snape that Harry never really got to see. And Lily. OH Lily, she sounds like that in my head too :)

Thank you so much :) It's quite sad that Harry never got the chance. To some extent, Remus and Sirius give us a great sense of who they were, but they obviously focus on James.

Thank you so much, Bethany. Your challenge was pretty great :)


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