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Review:Erised says:
Hi again Adi, back for more!

Okay, my first reaction: OMG THE FEELS! Ughhh. You have managed to pack so much emotion in to this chapter and I just don't know whether to cry for poor Snape or go and hug Lily about Petunia! Although Snape has that covered it seems. ;)

So I'll start with Lily. I felt that you managed to capture all the conflicting emotions that Lily would have felt really well here - her excitement and nervousness about Hogwarts, feeling guilty about seeing Severus when Petunia was around, and of course underlying this the fierce loyalty that she feels towards her sister and then ensuing heartbreak at her rejection. It's a lot of things for one eleven year old to feel but with just a few lines you really put across exactly what she was feeling. I also liked how at the station she was quite civil to James rather than when most stories having them hate each other from birth or something. I think after only knowing him a year she would just find him quite annoying rather than any hatred, so that was a good idea.

Now onto Snape. Well you have me completely and utterly on his side and I wish James/Lily never happened. :P You write his young character so well and I just really feel for him. He seems so hopeful and clearly loves Lily even from that age. It makes it even more believable when the canon events happen and that Snape's life basically ends when Lily dies. It's just so sad and he is so cute that I can't help but pity him. :(

And the cute little kiss! Awww. It was just so sweet to add that little moment between the two of them and it wasn't too full on either considering they're both still young. It also managed to open up a lot of opportunity until you killed me with the line, "That was the only kiss Severus Snape ever got from Lily Evans." Why why why! It's just so heartbreaking. :(

I think you did a really good job of describing little details like the sun catching Lily's hair and with the cherrry blossoms as the setting. It really added to the whole thing and made the chapter much more realistic because you could imagine where they were. Perhaps even more description of the settings and things for instance the busy station wouldn't go amiss, but it's awesome just the way it is!

Another great chapter Adi, I can't wait to read the next! :)

Jenny

Author's Response: Jenny! I responded to this review first, today... and my response seems to have disappeared, which is quite dis-heartening. I'd gushed a lot about another amazing review. As you know, I love anything you have to say! You leave perfect reviews! :)

I'll have another go and giving you a proper reply. You deserve it.

I love it when you complement the characterization, because it is a really important part of any story, and to know that I've gotten it right is HUGE! :)

I'm really happy to hear that you think I've conveyed the multitude of emotions that Lily feels at this juncture, well. While Snape gives her the kind of understanding company that she loves and needs, she cannot derive complete pleasure from it without Petunia's approval. Having a sibling really teaches you how to look at things in these cases. I definitely think that Petunia's approval would mean a lot to Lily.

I'm a huge Jily shipper, and I must say, I don't think she feel genuine hatred for him. Just a strong degree of annoyance, which comes out when provoked. Also, this annoyance isn't something that she has from the beginning. It's something that gradually develops.

As I said, I adore Jily. I'm such a canon compliant freak! But writing it from Snape's point of view has really given me a whole new take on things. I love that you think I've written him well! :) And I completely love how you've put that bit about his life ending with Lily's death. Though it does sort of give him a purpose to go on.

Haha, I had a feeling that that line would elicit that kind of a response! But I was going for the heart-breaking feel. I'm sorry. Somethings have to be done!

Thank you so much for appreciating the imagery, setting and symbolism. And I think you have a good point with the King's Cross scene. I was planning to add in another scene in this chapter. So when I get around to editing it, I'll certainly look into that!

Thank you once again for this absolutely lovely review :D You're amazing, Jenny. And I suspect you're spoiling me!

Thanks again!


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