Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:APerkins says:
Hey, I have decided to keep reviewing, (cause Im really enjoying reading this actually :P)
I still think you do multiple dialogue really well, and I am enjoying watching the friendship blossom between Remus & Mel.
Also am liking the fun and humour you've managed to add to the story.

I did get a little stuck on one of the Mel/Sirius interactions in this chapter though. The second one was pretty clear, but the first one, where he is kinda sizing her up: " So I heard you went on a date with Remus" - that one I felt like I didnt quite understand it properly. I couldn't work out where Sirius was coming from - presumably Mel couldn't either and thus the confusion, but you conveyed that much better in their second interaction; where he is checking to see if she is ok.
In that convo it was clearer what each of them were thinking. He hadn't quite made his mind up but was giving her the benefit of the doubt, apologising for his brother etc. Mel was still baffled, but as the reader I got it - the mix of his emotions and what he was going through. I thought you did that last part of the chapter really well actually! (Gunna keep reading and reviewing :)

Author's Response: Thank you :D You have no idea how wonderful it is to log in and find another review from you! You're a treasure:)

Sirius never struck me as the type to be open about his feelings or what he is thinking, so since it's from Melanie's point of view, I guess it would be cryptic. But she doesn't really understand him yet. Sirius, of course, isn't fond of Slytherins in general and just doesn't understand why Remus would be talking to one in the first place.

Thank you for your compliments about my dialogue, I'd never really considered that a strength of mine so that's really nice to hear :)

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!!

Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 587
Submit Report: