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Review:Trundlebug says:
This was an excellent scene. I like anything that really how a character thinks and what they feel, and you have certainly accomplished that here. And you did it with a minor character and made it your own. Always good.

The writing is very well-done, and it reads fluidly. My only gripe was that it wasn't about 10 times longer than it is. I read it in around a minute and immediately wanted more, and that's always a sign that you did right by a piece.

Good job all around, and a solid 9 for sheer story-telling skill, but I'm keeping that last point because you teased us with such a short bit.

Very good work


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