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Review:patronus_charm says:
Hello there Iím here with your review!

I know Iíve read a few other things of yours but I have to said the quality of this compared to them has really improved. The level of description and detail you went into when writing about the surroundings was really wonderful and built up a great atmosphere for me to enjoy.

Seeing Harryís thoughts about Albus was really lovely, because I always imagined him to be a caring father so I loved seeing it here. Harryís a naturally anxious person and I imagined Albus to be the same so it was great to see it being echoed here.

I never thought about what happened to Spinnerís End, so seeing Harry come back to it, and almost care about Snapeís old home was really touching. Itís strange that this is the first next gen story Iíve seen include it as I would have thought it would have been written about more, so itís great that you managed to find a niche in a populated area.

The idea of finding the letter was really sweet and I could really sense Lily in the letter as it just felt like her if you know what I mean. Then the development of that letter and what else Harry might find was really great and kept the mystery of the story going.

One small thing I would suggest is perhaps have another read through of the chapter because in several cases capitals were missing for names, the spacing between words was larger than usual and there were a few comma issues. Theyíre all easy things to fix so I shouldnít worry too much it will just bring the standard of the chapter up that little bit more. Other than that, it was a very enjoyable read!

-Kiana

Author's Response: Thanks for taking the time out to review this :)
I'm glad you thought it was a good idea!

*SQUEAL* :D :D :D
It makes me SO happy to hear that you think I've improved so much. I really liked writing this, and the details made it just as enjoyable to imagine and write. I think that in a story like this, it was important to engage the visual senses too. So well, I tried!

I've always felt like Albus would end up just like Harry. At least in the beginning. It's nice to see that you share my thoughts! Harry is certainly an anxious person, and I feel that James' continuous taunting might've made Albus that way too :P

When I was thinking of what I could write for this challenge, this idea suddenly dawned upon me. I'm glad I chanced upon it and have found this niche in what you rightly call, a populated area.

I'm especially pleased that you liked the little letter. I've imagined Lily and Snape as having an incredibly close relationship before their fifth year, and I really wanted to be able to show the innocence of her feelings for him at that point of time.

Thanks for pointing out the errors. I'll be sure to fix that :)
Thanks again!


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