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Review:DracoFerret11 says:
Hello there! This is DarkRose from Ravenclaw on the forums here to review for you for the House Cup 2013! :D So, let's go over things:

Plot: Wow! When I finally realized the twist (about two lines before I read it), I was so shocked! Great job working that in! This story was both very beautiful and very sad. I felt so sorry for Lavender and I think your take on her escapism is very realistic. The ending where she went back to her fantasies was so perfect. Wonderfully done.

Characterization: Lavender's character is one that I usually don't like, but I think you did a terrific job of writing for her. She was so pitiful that I WANTED to pity her and help her. Her escapism made her very realistic and sad and touching. I really liked that. I also felt bad for Parvati who really just wants to help, but actually can't yet. So sad.

Descriptions: Absolutely BEAUTIFUL descriptions of the places that Lavender "visited." Some of the best I've read this competition. I could really see them and smell them and hear them. As I mentioned, I really believed her until RIGHT before you revealed the twist. I loved that you worked in things about how she used to only care about her appearance and at first those mentions seemed so trivial and then, WHAM, the realization. Great job!

Emotions: I love that Lavender is so broken, but she isn't even handling it yet. That's very realistic. I could imagine a real person handling PTSD in a similar way. I felt sorry for her.

Interactions: I felt bad that Parvati wants to help so much but can't yet and is getting frustrated. I can really imagine that she WOULD be frustrated. The situation can seem maddening, but she wanted to be a good friend so badly. I loved how she kept trying with Lavender, even when she wasn't getting through.

You did an awesome job with this! Congratulations! I was really impressed. Good luck with the House Cup!

--Emily

Author's Response: Hey Emily!

Thank you so much for choosing this story to read and having such nice things to say about it!

I'm really pleased you liked the plot. I'm always worried that i'm blatantly obviously when i'm working a twist in and so it's shocked me that most people didn't see the book thing coming.

It must have been hard for Lavender to deal with her new life. Everything she'd relied on before, her sense of identity and her sense of what reality was was stripped away from her. She no longer has that base to stand on so the only way, to her, for survival is to escape. Escape somewhere else where there is still the beauty that she desires and the big dreams and she doesn't have to worry as much about her scars. It would be a harrowing experience to live through that and I don't think everyone would get through it fine. Like you said, something akin to PTSD.

I'm sorry for Parvati too because she does care, she wants to be there for Lavender. Wants to be that rock and anchor for her but she's way out of her depth. She's lost Lavender long ago and she doesn't even know it yet. It wouldn't be easy for Lavender either, to see her best mate get on with life. She'd be left wondering at one point why she couldn't as well. That would also lead her to just escape the world because perhaps she sees that she can't see herself doing what Parvati has done.

I'm really pleased you liked the descriptions of these places. I've only ever been to China and every other country I wrote her going I was just creating the atmosphere from pictures or from stories i've heard told about them. I had felt that they were lacking in depth though or that i was skimming over it.

Thank you for all your compliments and lovely words about this story!

-zayne


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