|Review:||nott theodore says:|
I know I've already read this but I really wanted to leave a review and have the chance to talk about it in more detail, because it's a really lovely story to read.
First, I think you have a really original and interesting concept in telling this story from Scabbers' point of view. Normally you wouldn't think of an animal narrating a story, but of course Scabbers is actually a human in rat form, so while he's still clearly Ron's pet, he also has the knowledge and experience that Pettigrew has. It makes sense that he would be able to name all of the family and have detailed opinions and memories of each of them, since he's been with them for so long.
I'm really impressed with your characterisation in this story. You're dealing with a lot of well-known characters here but each one is consistent; Molly fusses, Fred and George are mischievous, Percy is bookish and rule-abiding. They all seem to interact with each other in a very believable and realistic way as well, which is quite difficult to do.
I really liked the humour element of this story, because even though it's a horrible thing that Charlie turned into a crocodile, I couldn't help laughing about it, especially with Bill's girly scream and Percy fainting at the sight of his brother. I was laughing quite a lot at different points in the story (who can't laugh when Fred and George are around?) and Scabbers' comments at times were really amusing.
You also managed to do something amazing with this - I actually liked Scabbers/Peter Pettigrew in this story! I'm majorly impressed that you managed that, because the only time I seem to like him is in a well-written Marauders story, but I did like his character here. His short comments which are interspersed throughout the narration are actually quite endearing (except for the Death Eater one!) and I found myself warming to him as a narrator and a character too. He definitely did something favourable when he helped Ron and Ginny escape the Erumpent! Good rat! ;)
The only suggestion I have would be that Scabbers/Peter could have more of a reaction when he hears Arthur talking about Sirius Black. We know that his health started deteriorating from the point his breakout became common knowledge, so a little more fear at that point and perhaps a few more remembrances of it during the story would enhance Scabbers' narration even more.
Great job, Sophie! I really enjoyed reading this!
Author's Response: Hi Sian! Gah, this review is so awesome! Woo go gryffindor!
Thank you -- the idea came to me when I was eating cheese the other day, and I realized if I did do it for the House Cup, I could do it about the Weasley's too! I imagined Scabbers as a bit dry and sarcastic, but still quite attached to the Weasleys, even without him realizing.
Awh, you're so sweet! Thanks! I tried to capture all of their general personalities, and try to contrast and compare them -- because they're a flavoured bunch, The Weasleys, with a rang of personalities which makes them immense fun to write about!
I wanted it to be some muggleish animal that could be in Egypt - I read the other day there are quite a lot of crocs around the River Nile in Egypt, so I thought Why not? Mainly, also, because I happen to think the alliterationg of Charlie crocodile is funny too!
Yes, I found Scabbers quite challenging at times . He must be battlign with himself, because truly I believe he must've been nice once upon a time. He wasn't against James and Lily all the time, because other wise no body would've liked him. Plus, i didn't want to focus on his betrayal too much, because I figured as a rat you'd have more important things to think about. I wanted to make him do something kind of honourable, but then not too brave - something kind of gryffindorish, but then I guess, with the attitude of a Slytherin if that makes sense?!
That's an awesome idea! I will definitely try to do that, after the word cuont doesn't matter! Thank you so much for such a lovely review Sian - it made my day! Gahh, I'm squishing you through the computer screen right now. :)