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Review:MadiMalfoy says:
Hello there! Here with your requested review! :)

Well, since you just want a general, I'll cover the basics to help you out as much as I can! :)

Your grammar and spelling are really quite good--I didn't notice any mistakes at all! The descriptions of the house and the characters are phenomenal. The intimate detail of how worn and weary and war-torn Draco looks in comparison to Astoria's polished look is great! The minimalistic and bareness really helps convey the message you want of how dark and demanding and necessary this is going to be for Astoria.

Characterization was very good. I love when the more obscure characters are the main focus of the story, so yay! I think you have her and Draco very close to canon (since they do end up getting married canonically), which is fantastic! As I've gathered, this is a couple of years past Hogwarts, but the war still rages, yes? I think if it was specified how old Astoria was in the first bit when she's a child, then her age, and therefore Draco's age, can be figured out for continuity and easier understanding.

As far as plot flow goes, I think you've done a very nice job in getting things started. The snippet of backstory you give Astoria was brilliant and allows for the perfect set up of her and her secret-keeping/making/telling skills and what that means for her in the future.

In general, a great start to what I'm sure will be a wonderful story! Please feel free to re-request for other chapters! :)
~MadiMalfoy xx

Author's Response: Thank you so much for your review! And for specificity--I love it!

Oh my gosh, I am like tearing up--well, figuratively. You totally get the contrast. Stuff came across! Bahaha, it worked!!! No, really, I appreciate your thoughts on the scenery and tone, and I am so thrilled that you thought--and put into beautiful review-words--about the tone and how it was meant to convey Astoria's situation in just the way I had hoped.

I don't know if that made sense. I am sort of flailing around mentally today, so my apologies if I am not exactly comprehensible.

Time is a little difficult--I know it has confused some people in that first chapter, and I have been trying to figure out how to fix it. Chapter 2 clears things up, I think, but I'd rather be clear from the get go.

The story actually opens during Easter Holidays in DH, a few days before Harry, Hermione, and Ron are brought to Malfoy Manor. The war is still going on, and Voldemort is in power, which is why Astoria's family's fate is in the hands of a certain Death Eater. Astoria is still in school, but home for the holiday--she's 16. I labeled it as post-Hogwarts because the way I have it planned, the story stretches beyond their time as students. And DH takes place completely out of Hogwarts, so I felt that if I put that tag on it, people would be expecting a school story. Perhaps I should change it, though. It might clarify things a bit.

What a good suggestion about specifying Astoria's age in the prologue snippet! That might be just the thing to solve this conundrum. I'll see if I can fit it in.

Thank you so much! That was a fabulously helpful review. I will definitely be re-requesting!


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